I cant tell you that it will be easy but this is the first step to take. Stop focusing on her do what god askes us to do. If you are putting her first then you are putting her before god and you will never have all that you want untill god becomes first in your life. The second step is to realize that every time tou text or call her you are giving her the power to control your life also god wants to be in control. I am telling you this because i am in the same boat and it took three nights of constant prayer for mr to come to this conclusion. She can not respect you if you cant show her what a godly leader is and your relationship with any one has to show that you are a godly leader more with a wife than anyone but it has to be consistent GOD FIRST

Quayp is so right. You are giving her the power and if she is not responding you have to take a step back and give her some space. I know how you feel and you desperately are looking for response from her. It only hurts worse when there is no answer. Give it some time and what will be will be. Hang in there

I'm in same place. Thanks for the feedback about giving them control. I sure don't want to to do that. So hard going through this.

That's the sure road to never healing...it's difficult but gets easier the longer you go no contact...don't let her know your tormented by her leaving. If you want her to have the tiniest bit of doubt and discomfort about leaving you you'll cut her off immediately and let her feel what missing you means. This isn't a ploy to get an ex back as I don't believe reconciliation is really viable after someone gives up and dumps the other but it's a tool to help you heal. Go 100% no contact for the quickest route to getting over an ex..I learned the hard way but i finally did it

I*'m sorry for your pain, been there and done that. My ex walked 3 years ago in Feb. I really hurt my healing by constantly breaking no contact. He never broke it, I DID and after so many attempts at reconciling with him, hoping he'd come back home, he had made up his mind, I was fighting a loosing battle and the sad part is he wasn't even in the fight. I could have saved myself a TON of heartache if I would have just stopped trying. I don't have any regrets that I at least tried but had I known that the outcome wouldn't have changed, I would have stopped making contact sooner than later. My counselor asked once why would I go the whole 9 innings for the same outcome, hmmm, good question right? I am proud to say I am 1 year no contact (Jan. 5th to be exact) and I have to say, it really does help the healing process. I never thought I would make it but most of us don't have a choice, this is the time to take care of you. Most of the time they don't deserve our thoughts and tears, they have moved on. We certainly deserve someone who loves us as much as we love them but we need to heal first. Take as long as you need but try and not wallow in the past (like me) it doesn't help at all!
We here on DS know your pain as we have lived it, some still living it. In the early stages of my hell, I had to take baby steps....I'll go one week w/out contacting him, then I was able to go 1 month, 2 months, etc. Yes, you'll slip once in awhile (I did constantly), but start over immediately.
Sending you prayers and hugs, it really is a difficult journey but as time goes by you will start to feel better, I promise.

You have to be able to cut off your dependency with her. I know that is a lot easier said then done, I really do but in order for you to grow and move on in your life you have to find a way to let go.

Pay no mind to these jesus-y people. Strength comes from within, not from outside. They don't understand the philosophical difference that even if you choose to adhere to some sort of archaic dogma, it's still their choice and it's something that goes on entirely in their minds. The first thing is in the interest of self perservation you may have to delete her contact info to save yourself from yourself before you get slapped with a harassment based restraining order. That would just be salt in your wounds and you don't need that on your record. What you are suffering through is an attachment problem and I'm going through my own heart-ripping stuff myself. I have 2 boys and my wife revealed she's having an affair, we still live together because she needs my financial support and uses the kids as emotional extortion. She'said totally cold and unapologetic to me and frankly provocative. Acceptance is the final stage of grief and I get being stuck on it. You cant make someone love you no matter how much you love them. I understand the pain of rejection/betrayal. I'm only on 3 weeks since her confession. There is no hope of reconciliation, she has made it painfully clear to me, as your ex has made it to you. Letting go can be excruciating, but that doesn't mean it isn't necessary. You have to realize this is more of an attachment than love if it's one sided. We can't be puppies and follow the mean dog around, we're just going to keep getting bitten. Nothing we can do will bring these people back to us. The best thing we can do is focus on actions not feelings. Go to work, go to the supermarket, eat healthy foods, shower and shave, go to the dr and get a low dose anti depressant and take it at night (so you can sleep and think more clearly) surround yourself with friends and real family. It's not going to 'poof' get better overnight it's a rough road. Continuing to fixate looks like obsession to an outside observer. You've become a stranger to her no matter how you feel. It sucks. I know that myself. The best thing you can do is take care of yourself so eventually you can make yourself the best man you can be for that other woman wandering around who you haven't met yet who may be your true mate. One who won't abandon you, appreciates you and has your back for life. There are literally BILLIONS of women in the world, I know you think you love this one, but fixating on a dead relationship prevents you from seeing the other people and beautiful things the world has to offer. The mystery of the future is the best thing going for us. We don't know who or what may come along. If we've hit emotional rock-bottom, there is no way to go but up. It's like one of those Tibetan buddhist monasteries in the mountains with the ridiculous staircase. Every day you take at least one step, some says you may take many. The journey is long and arduous. Some days you may make no progress but it's essential not to slide backwards which continuing to beat a dead horse is.

Ya you can't attach yourself to a person who doesn't want to be attached to you or else harrassment charges are around the corner. I know it can be intriguing when someone doesn't want you...You want them even more. Though that is human nature and it's got to be controlled because there's laws and respect needed for the other person. Think of how you would feel if someone you didn't love at all texted you all the time. Wouldn't you feel kind of suffocated? Sometimes we need to leave people alone though we love them and want that in return.