Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
So I'm new to this site and online support in general. I was seeing a therapist for the past 6 weeks and she suggested I give this a try and It feels really good seeing similar stories to mine, not that I would like anyone to suffer emotionally but at least I know I'm not the only one crying over my ex every night. So here's my story..
I met my ex august of 2013 in a class. He sat right next to me and when the teacher said to switch emails with a partner, I just gave him my number not thinking it would ever become anything. I was NOT attracted to him one bit. A week later, I started talking to a guy in another class that really caught my attention. A week later, my ex starts flirting with me through texts.. starts by asking me for a bag of chips (for asking him for notes) and it became drinks and then dinner. I flirted back a little because it was just funny. Eventually I had a test that I needed to study for and I like someone helping so he volunteered to help me. I decided to put my leg on his and he started massaging it. So while I was flirting with this guy.. I became really interested in the other guy but this guy was an asshole. He liked to make me sad all the time and very controlling. While the second guy made me miserable, my ex was always the shoulder I cried on. He would leave work early to make sure i'm okay, take me to the beach at 11pm for an hour, take me to nice dinners, made me dinners, gave me massages.. he was basically perfect except he was agnostic and he needed to convert to my religion for us to ever be anything serious. The other guy, asshole, was my religion which is why I leaned more towards him. My ex would always tell me he saw the house with me. The more I pushed him away, the sweeter he became. He would stay up late to help me study for exams and wake up early to review.
He was perfect. Eventually we started dating and he told me he converted and we got engaged. 2 weeks later, I got in a bad car accident that left me with a fractured neck and stitches, i was in the hospital for 4 days. I was meeting up with him and I never made it there. He stayed with me in the hospital, sleeping on the floor. every time i needed or asked for something, he would be the first to tell me "yes babe?" I got in the accident in November of 2014 and we scheduled to marry February 28. I was in a lot of pain and we got in a lot of arguments because I was with my parents 3 hours away from him and a lot of our communications was on the phone. Dealing with the accident and wedding planning and the usual arguments we had over stupid shit all the time would get to me.. I started being verbally abusive. He broke up with me a month before our wedding and said he can't trust me and I keep abusing him and breaking up with him over every problem. In my defense, he would lie to me about things he would share with him mom and he never would give me space with i got mad and he would never listen and understand. I realize today that is not an excuse but it was really stressful.
Things got worse over time after the break up. He won't forgive me and he keeps telling me that he doesn't trust me and he is not willing to put his heart on the line again. I also found out last week that he had lied to me about converting and his family knew and they all lied to me for their son's happiness so I don't leave him. I can't stop crying. I am miserable and depressed. I try to talk to him every day hoping he would forgive me and every day he tells me he wants space and he doesn't want to try with anyone and if he did, he would want to try again. He recognizes that he messed up but he won't forgive me for my mistakes and it kills me inside. I LOVE HIM! I am ready to fix my shit even though he lied to me. I am willing to lie to my family about his converting to be with him. Am I crazy? I decided today to give him space.. I called him on the phone and I was asking to see him for my birthday in 2 months and he said we can go to a water park and asked if i was going to wear a bathing suit and i said yes but you can't touch. and he says yes i can and i told him he can't talk to me like that if he wants nothing to do with me. and he said fine send me a pic of you in a see through bikini and i won't touch and it made me really frustrated. how can you talk to me like that but not want to be with me?? I said so i'm just a pretty body and he got offended and said not to start that. but I'm so confused!! I plan on giving him space and he said he would think about us and get back to me and also regarding my birthday.. is he going to come back to me? i'm so lost and don't know what to think anymore..help me..
I met my ex august of 2013 in a class. He sat right next to me and when the teacher said to switch emails with a partner, I just gave him my number not thinking it would ever become anything. I was NOT attracted to him one bit. A week later, I started talking to a guy in another class that really caught my attention. A week later, my ex starts flirting with me through texts.. starts by asking me for a bag of chips (for asking him for notes) and it became drinks and then dinner. I flirted back a little because it was just funny. Eventually I had a test that I needed to study for and I like someone helping so he volunteered to help me. I decided to put my leg on his and he started massaging it. So while I was flirting with this guy.. I became really interested in the other guy but this guy was an asshole. He liked to make me sad all the time and very controlling. While the second guy made me miserable, my ex was always the shoulder I cried on. He would leave work early to make sure i'm okay, take me to the beach at 11pm for an hour, take me to nice dinners, made me dinners, gave me massages.. he was basically perfect except he was agnostic and he needed to convert to my religion for us to ever be anything serious. The other guy, asshole, was my religion which is why I leaned more towards him. My ex would always tell me he saw the house with me. The more I pushed him away, the sweeter he became. He would stay up late to help me study for exams and wake up early to review.
He was perfect. Eventually we started dating and he told me he converted and we got engaged. 2 weeks later, I got in a bad car accident that left me with a fractured neck and stitches, i was in the hospital for 4 days. I was meeting up with him and I never made it there. He stayed with me in the hospital, sleeping on the floor. every time i needed or asked for something, he would be the first to tell me "yes babe?" I got in the accident in November of 2014 and we scheduled to marry February 28. I was in a lot of pain and we got in a lot of arguments because I was with my parents 3 hours away from him and a lot of our communications was on the phone. Dealing with the accident and wedding planning and the usual arguments we had over stupid shit all the time would get to me.. I started being verbally abusive. He broke up with me a month before our wedding and said he can't trust me and I keep abusing him and breaking up with him over every problem. In my defense, he would lie to me about things he would share with him mom and he never would give me space with i got mad and he would never listen and understand. I realize today that is not an excuse but it was really stressful.
Things got worse over time after the break up. He won't forgive me and he keeps telling me that he doesn't trust me and he is not willing to put his heart on the line again. I also found out last week that he had lied to me about converting and his family knew and they all lied to me for their son's happiness so I don't leave him. I can't stop crying. I am miserable and depressed. I try to talk to him every day hoping he would forgive me and every day he tells me he wants space and he doesn't want to try with anyone and if he did, he would want to try again. He recognizes that he messed up but he won't forgive me for my mistakes and it kills me inside. I LOVE HIM! I am ready to fix my shit even though he lied to me. I am willing to lie to my family about his converting to be with him. Am I crazy? I decided today to give him space.. I called him on the phone and I was asking to see him for my birthday in 2 months and he said we can go to a water park and asked if i was going to wear a bathing suit and i said yes but you can't touch. and he says yes i can and i told him he can't talk to me like that if he wants nothing to do with me. and he said fine send me a pic of you in a see through bikini and i won't touch and it made me really frustrated. how can you talk to me like that but not want to be with me?? I said so i'm just a pretty body and he got offended and said not to start that. but I'm so confused!! I plan on giving him space and he said he would think about us and get back to me and also regarding my birthday.. is he going to come back to me? i'm so lost and don't know what to think anymore..help me..
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