Breakups & Divorce Support Group

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I Can't Believe I Am Back Here Again

Backhereagain
Backhereagain

I used to believe in giving a person a second chance.  When you explain to the other person that you felt abandoned and discarded and that their behavior almost broke you, how do you as a person let it happen again?  How do you allow them to draw you in again only to cause even more damage?

brandnewangel
brandnewangel
When we love people unconditionally We want to believe they changed and they wouldn’t hurt us . Most
Of the time they just need something and they go back to their old ways when they get it , these people are what my Dad used to call sponges they suck the life out of people.
Lavender80
Lavender80
Seeing the good in people is a beautiful quality. Being forgiving is also. However, when someone has "pattern" of hurting or abusing you, you have to come to a point and say enough is enough.

It's very hard to do. I can say, I gave many chances, much more than I should. I don't regret that I did, because it was a lesson I had to learn.

Looking back I can clearly say now, and see now that this person is who he is. He has his patterns, his behaviors, his lies, his truths, and his justifications.

I think if someone is really sorry and ready to change, it has to be him who shows you that. Both thru his words and actions. But some are also good at being good for awhile to get you back, and revert to old behaviors.

Sometimes it takes stepping outside of your emotions, and see the whole picture objectively. As if you were a friend hearing the story you been thru, what would you tell that friend?

Don't be so hard on yourself. We have all done that. Treat it as a life lesson that will help you in future relationships. Don't let it affect your self worth, and the light inside of you.

Sending you light and love!
Dylantry_5673
Dylantry_5673
Relationships are work. Two people have to have a plan, a goal and strategies to help along the way. Whatever goes wrong needs to be communicated, talked about, and worked out together.

As far as second chances..if b you truly love someone and know they feel the same way, maybe a good thing would be to have a set time to work on yourself, where they can be there for you and vice versa. (4-6 weeks) Then once you see each other again you will be able to tell if the change is real.