Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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kornboy85 09/06/2017

The title pretty much says it all. I feel pretty pissed today. In case anyone has not been following my posts, my wife told me that the other guy would help her pack everything in a truck sometime on Tuesday or afterward (she hasn't given me an exact date) since his kids are going back to school. I haven't heard from her, which doesn't come to a shock to me. There is something I think I haven't mentioned in my previous posts and everyone will tell me to stop it. I have been going through her email and saw that she reserved a u-Haul truck to be picked up today in the afternoon. But what is weird is that it was reserved for a four-hour rental and the return location is back in the state where she is at. I don't know if that is an error or not. But either way, I know she is not coming back, and I am still moving forward in the divorce. I haven't reached out to her, and I feel that I shouldn't. There is no point in my opinion. But she is stringing me along and I feel pissed. It took her half a day to pack her stuff and leave me, yet she is taking her time to come home. I have my therapy session tomorrow and I know my therapist will throw in possibilities why my wife may be taking her time. I don't know if my therapist is more optimistic than a realist. I have left a message with my divorce lawyer, and even waiting for her to call me back is upsetting me. I just want to sleep throughout the whole day, but that is not going to happen. I wish there was a way people in this post, can actually verbally talk, get together, like actually having a meeting. Don't get me wrong, writing this has been helpful. But to actually be around people who are also going through this where we can actually be there for one another would be helpful. It can at least give us purpose throughout our day. I am trying to find a support group where I am at, but I just don't know where to look. But I'll appreciate hearing from you guys soon.

jojored 09/06/2017

I found a divorce support group at meetup.com. It was a 45 minute drive from my home, but well worth it. It is so valuable to be around other people who understand what you're going through, and who will not judge. I heard some real horror tales (maybe some thought my divorce was a horror tale in itself), and hearing the toughest stories really helped me to see how other people had survived going through with a divorce. Survive then thrive. I'd like to think I'm on the thrive end of things :) You will be one day, too.

copingwith2 09/06/2017

I knw how you feel. They tell you one thing but do another. I keep reminding myself actions speak louder than words. In my case his actions are showing he is not coming back and he never was going to. This is heart breaking but I need to protect myself and my kids. You need to do the same. Calling your divorce lawyer is the right move. If something does change you can always stop the proceedings but if you never start them then you are stuck in the same spot. I can give this advice but i am no good at following it. Sometimes i wish i could turn back time so i could fix it but i can't. So moving forward is all we can do.

sleepless1 09/06/2017

I'm so sorry! I know how much you wanted this to happen. I know a lot of people will tell you to have no contact and typically that bothers me. I think if you are married to someone and you want to contact them you should be able to. I guess I just don't believe in playing games. You should be able to express yourself, ask questions, say what you need to say and all of that stuff. But in this case I seriously think you should cut contact with her. Give her a chance to miss you. Don't be available. Let her sit and wonder where you are and who you are with. If she doesn't give a damn then you don't need to be with her. If you ghost her and she still has any feelings for you it will drive her crazy. And maybe it's too late for that. Maybe you are pissed off enough to just get the divorce and try to MoveOn. It won't be easy. I suffer each and every day as I go through mine. And I would be lying if I said I didn't still hope for A miracle. I was really hoping for a happy ending on this one. I'm not sure that I have read any post that end with reconciliation and happiness. If there's any out there please let me know.

Lenoire 09/07/2017

If you are feeling angry, chances are you haven't entered your grief period. You haven't let go. You're holding on with all your might. For those who hope for a miracle, this is something you're doing to yourself. Irrational and idealistic thoughts keep us in limbo. The period of grief doesn't start until you make the realization that your life as you've known it is over, and it's time to let go of everything you've known, and start anew.

Holding onto desires that you know are fruitless, becomes an exercise in self-torture. And sometimes we need to do this to ourselves, when we're raw, and we end up believing a lot of things that are not true or rational.

It's only when we are able to grow up emotionally, and realize that in this world, all we really have is ourselves. There's no one to lean on or get support from that's going to make any damn difference. Becoming and being self-sustainable is the biggest gift you can give to yourself. Not only will it give you strength, but the insight of perseverance to live life with joy. Life was never meant to be a struggle.

Wishing you well.

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