uuuggggghhhhhh.

The wonders and joy of single life revisited. Just what none of us wanted!

Sorry we're in this boat together!!

All I can say is that I won't give up hope. I will find someone to love, who loves me right back, who loves my son like he was hers, who shares my morals, blah, blah, blah. You've heard it. Well, I'll find her!
Good luck to ya!! We all could use a bit of that--never hurts, I guess!

So hard to meet that one guy, nothing wrong, just know, you need just a one guy. Once you meet him, you will know and it was worth it.

I unfortuately agree with you. I am presently healing from an illness, but my wish for us is to find happiness regardless of having a member of the opposite sex. Or the same sex.

I have found much of what you sre describing, and for myself the search is over.

That's what I hear too.

I have found much of the same when trying to date since my split. With some of what I experienced recently, I am a bit discouraged. So is it ok if I sit in this boat with you? I'll bring a cooler with cold drinks and even help paddle.

Time for a break, and maybe permanently.

I remember this feeling all to well. I promise you that it is temporary and will pass!!

It took me 4 years (Im the pokey puppy, so dont let my number scare you) before I could really even think about it.

Seriously... I thought I was asexual for a while because the hottest guy on the planet could walk past me and I woulnt even blink. I was completely numb.

But it wont last forever.

Maybe you are as sensitive to people's energy as I am. You kind of know right away if something doesnt feel quite right, and that is a good thing.

And when the right person comes along its magnified times a million and you will know.

Wishing you the best!

Unfortunately, that's the situation when dating in the later years. The "pool" is definitely smaller and more shallow~lol.

After two failed relationships post divorce, I put myself on a year-long dating break. I decided to use the time to focus on me and do some journaling, counseling, soul-searching, and reading. I learned a lot about myself and what I would and would not tolerate from a man. I'm glad I took this time--it helped me gain a lot of courage and perspective that I really needed. When I look back on my early dating adventures, I realized I wasn't ready and shouldn't have been dating.

One book that helped me tremendously was Date or Soulmate by Neil Clark Warren (he's the eHarmony guy). This fabulous book helped me really examine why I pick the guys I did and helped me to learn about myself. Now I understand why I choose certain guys and steer clear of them. This book also helped give me the courage to stand up to guys who are not treating me with respect and call them on their bad behavior. I guess this dating break helped me find my courage again.

I now look at dating in a whole new way: I am not just looking for ANYONE; I am looking for SOMEONE GOOD. There's a big difference there.

I recommend you get the book and do a little self-reflection. It will help.

Hugs!! Dating at this time in life is not for the faint of heart.

OBRMoldy keep believing it you will find a genuine woman there are plenty out there and right one is waiting for you.

Well, I'm finding it is best to be straight up with the guys from the get-go..I tell them I want to date, but am taking my time finding the right one and don't wanna jump head first into something with the first nice guy that comes along. They understand that because it's pretty plain. You have a larger pool to choose from them me, lucky you. I want attention. I admit it. I won't compromise myself to get it, though. I go by my rules. If someone asked me to marry them right away, that is the last date with them! Too creepy :) hugs, though...

I am the same as you. It has been 2.5 years and I still have no interest in dating. RIght now I just can't think of being with someone else. It gets lonely at times, but I just don't feel I have the energy to put out so much to have it all fall apart.

I may stay like my mother who has been on her own more years than I can remember and she lives a very full life.

Thank you for all your advice and best wishes. I think I do pick up on people's energy, one guy told me I intimidate the hell out of him (turned out that I was right, he was stretching the truth about a lot of things). I am starting to wonder about being asexual too...

You are absolutely fine, awesome and don't you forget it. I have probably felt Asexual for a few years too but i do know i do not want to date or have a relationship yet or for a long time. i think i could handle a one night thing just to feel like i AM a woman and to validate myself but to scared to as i don't want anyone reading anything more into it. Is that selfish??

It is okay to take a break. That does not mean you are asexual, just that you need a break! I will never, never, never tie my life that closely to another partner. I want someone to share parts of my life with, but, after spending 20 years giving of myself and having the life sucked out of me by my ex, I am not willing to take that chance. I am very happy with finding someone to share laughs, sex, activities, but being able to come home to MY home, so I can be alone when I choose to also!

I am not ready to date, just can't make that jump yet, even though I see lots of men who exicte me, they are always younger than me...shoot! Nice to look at though!