I'm so sorry that you are hurting. You are not alone. I too had a husband who portrayed himself as this great guy but he abandoned me while in the hospital getting chemo. Everyone knows what he is really like now. So I can say I personally know how you feel. I am here if you need to talk.

I'm very sorry for the pain and discomfort you are in! And I got to be honest here, I used to be one of those guys, got to be perfect, got to make everyone think I've got it all together, got to make sure everyone thinks I'm wonderful ect. ect. ect. It's taken a lot of therapy to admit that. But when I was living that sort of life, I wasn't being a better guy for it, I was actually cheating myself, cheating my family, cheating my friends and cheating any possible love interests in my life.

I hope one day your ex-husband wakes up and takes that long hard look in the mirror and can not hide to himself what he truly is. And maybe, just maybe he'll want to do something about it. I'm sorry you got hurt by some who used to be like me, it's not right and it wasn't fair to you!

Best wishes!

I had a wife that portrays herself as sweet caring and nice
She hid her affair with one of our children's "coach like mentors"

People but her bullshit and look down their noses at me.

Probably pretty common, it is all too easy to see the whipped cream and all too hard to see the shit upon which it sets,

Plus people couldn't be bothered ... Why think about her story, why see her for what see is, maybe more people are like her with affairs and secrets they want to hide

Live your life in the light, let the creepers creep they don't want anything to do with daylight

I'm so sorry you're hurting.
I think you might be surprised at how much people see through his crap. They don't usually say anything for awhile but eventually you might hear that they always thought you could do better.
You said you got rid of your social worker...what about a counselor? Have you been seeing one? Are you open to antidepressants? Sometimes they are a good tool to get everything back in balance and help you function better until this isn't all so raw.
I would also recommend limiting your contact with him as much as possible. If there are kids involved, you'll have to have some contact about them but anything else can be done through lawyers.
If he's being abusive (physically or verbally) document it. If there is physical abuse, call the police. Do whatever you need to do to keep you and if applicable, your kids safe.
Good luck!