Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
My ex won't tell me what he is getting the kids for Christmas. He says that it doesn't matter..if they get 2 of something they will need it at both house's anyway.
There are a lot of things that my kids don't need 2 of.
The past year has been bad. Now that he is about to marry the Step-Ho..it's about to get worse.
She believes in 2 house's..2 sets of everything. If she sends pajamas with her son to her ex's house..he gets 5 voicemails reminding him to send back "her" pajamas.
I disagree. To me..the kids belongings are thier belongings..and they can take them wherever they want. For the past year I have been sending clothes, movies, EVERYTHING that they need with them to thier Dad's.
I can only assume that the Christmas thing is some kind of childish.. whatever. He doesn't HAVE to tell me..so he isn't going to.
He has the kids on Christmas Eve. If he gives them what they are asking "Santa" for..they will be disappointed.
I don't get it..but I think I am going to have to get used to it.
There are a lot of things that my kids don't need 2 of.
The past year has been bad. Now that he is about to marry the Step-Ho..it's about to get worse.
She believes in 2 house's..2 sets of everything. If she sends pajamas with her son to her ex's house..he gets 5 voicemails reminding him to send back "her" pajamas.
I disagree. To me..the kids belongings are thier belongings..and they can take them wherever they want. For the past year I have been sending clothes, movies, EVERYTHING that they need with them to thier Dad's.
I can only assume that the Christmas thing is some kind of childish.. whatever. He doesn't HAVE to tell me..so he isn't going to.
He has the kids on Christmas Eve. If he gives them what they are asking "Santa" for..they will be disappointed.
I don't get it..but I think I am going to have to get used to it.
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
our only hope for recovery and peace of mind is to recognize these disagreements for what they are.
This probably is not your situation, but there are sometimes other reasons for it.
I think the dual Santa lists are a great idea.
Courier..I understand your sons situation and in his shoes..I would do the same thing.
My ex isn't going to do "Santa" for the kids. He told me that Santa won't be coming to his house for them..I can do Santa.
He also, to date, won't buy them anything that is not a gift. He pays child support. I forgot to send socks for my oldest one time and he bought some..and asked me to pay him back. I did.
I honestly think this is all about being mean. The kids don't want, or need, to get the same gifts at both houses and niether have asked for much.
He thinks it will hurt me if Christmas is somehow spoiled for the kids. He is not thinking about them.
I will make sure and save my receipts this year.
I'm not going to let him ruin the Holidays for me.
You ex should work with you on the xmas gifts so the kids get the best christmas they can get.
Its about the kids, not about what we want to do.
I know this is frustrating... you are right, getting used to it is all you can do.
Step HO (hmm witch Ho, witch HO, witch HO... hmmm) - trying to make you laugh...
HUGS and hope you are feeling better my friend.
Chris
1. Is love your kids, have fun with them when at your house!
2. DO NOT LET HIM SPOIL YOUR HOLIDAYS.
3.REMEMBER IS HE IS AN ASS YOUR KIDS WILL SEE IT!
4. FOR EVERYONE ELSE TOO
Have'nt you heard it been called the holiday season? I doesnt have to be only one day. There can be many days throughout Christmas and New Years that you can use the time wisely. Make another day a special day (you dont have to let you ex know what day it is)
Most importantly in time your children will realize that you tried hard to make it good for them. That is what counts.
4. Life is too short
Maybe you can sit down and make up some little cards. Number them, and the gifts, so that you Know which is which. Put a Dollar amount in the Card and a little rhyme...give your child a "scavenger hunt" at the store.
Trying to think of Something to keep the childs excitement alive for the day. Allow them to have a Fun Memory and not feel the stress.
Won't pay for socks??? Give me a break. Well, maybe you should start applying the same rules. If you don't send movies with them, the x and step-ho have to buy some for their house.
I hope this gets easier as your kids get older, they will see what an ass their Dad really is, and appreciate you all the more.
(((hugs))) to you and your kids...