Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
some of you will be aware of my story but if not heres a quick recap.
married for 21 years he was my first love,my solemate etc,we have 2 children,he has left us 8 times in our relationship but always begged to come back after a few months.
he left again last april but we were talking and texting for months and i still believed we would get through this and he would come home.
then in july he told me he had been on 2 dates with someone but he didnt know if it would work as she lives 4 hours away,the next day i found out they had been together 7 months and he goes to her every weekend.
it was an awful time for both me and our children but we struggled on,we were still texting etc and were having hour long conversations about what went wrong between us.
he would row with her as apparently she is insecure and cant accept he has a past and is scared he would come home.
a few weeks ago he told me he is moving up there as he is getting chucked out were hes staying and has nothing here,lol,wich was hurtful to our kids.
then 2 weeks ago he went and stayed there to look for a job for a week but when he came home he came round and said hes really confused about what he wants to do,we spent the evening together and again talked a lot about what went wrong and what we could do to start again,then the next day he rang me and told me he had been up all night thinking and hed finished with her and to tell our kids he wasnt moving away.
he came round again and had dinner with us and when he left he said we would do this again and kissed me.
then the next day he didnt awnser my calls etc,and i find out hes back with her and the moves back on.he said he never led me on i just made it up and hes basically made his choice now just get on with it.
since then he has been awful to me swaying from talking to me like im nothing to asking me questions about my life as he cant stand the thought of me being with anyone else etc.
today i am really depressed as tonight he is meeting our children for the last time for a few months (he sais he will need time to settle in and find a new job)before he visits them again.
then he moves tomorrow,but why am i so sad?i know it is probably the best thing as i will have to just move on but it still hurts like hell.when will it start to feel easier to think of him?
married for 21 years he was my first love,my solemate etc,we have 2 children,he has left us 8 times in our relationship but always begged to come back after a few months.
he left again last april but we were talking and texting for months and i still believed we would get through this and he would come home.
then in july he told me he had been on 2 dates with someone but he didnt know if it would work as she lives 4 hours away,the next day i found out they had been together 7 months and he goes to her every weekend.
it was an awful time for both me and our children but we struggled on,we were still texting etc and were having hour long conversations about what went wrong between us.
he would row with her as apparently she is insecure and cant accept he has a past and is scared he would come home.
a few weeks ago he told me he is moving up there as he is getting chucked out were hes staying and has nothing here,lol,wich was hurtful to our kids.
then 2 weeks ago he went and stayed there to look for a job for a week but when he came home he came round and said hes really confused about what he wants to do,we spent the evening together and again talked a lot about what went wrong and what we could do to start again,then the next day he rang me and told me he had been up all night thinking and hed finished with her and to tell our kids he wasnt moving away.
he came round again and had dinner with us and when he left he said we would do this again and kissed me.
then the next day he didnt awnser my calls etc,and i find out hes back with her and the moves back on.he said he never led me on i just made it up and hes basically made his choice now just get on with it.
since then he has been awful to me swaying from talking to me like im nothing to asking me questions about my life as he cant stand the thought of me being with anyone else etc.
today i am really depressed as tonight he is meeting our children for the last time for a few months (he sais he will need time to settle in and find a new job)before he visits them again.
then he moves tomorrow,but why am i so sad?i know it is probably the best thing as i will have to just move on but it still hurts like hell.when will it start to feel easier to think of him?
The main thing is to take care of yourself.
Also, lose that guy. Let this be the first step in loving yourself more than you love a person no good for you. Try to turn away, walk away and never look back.
No relationship is better than a bad one.
Best of Luck
I've been married 28 years - husband had numerous affairs - which I had always forgivin him for. The last one was unforgivable and we are now divorcing. BUT I still can't get him out of my mind.
Trust me - it is best to let him go and move on - I am trying to do this as well and it is so very hard!!
You shared love and a family with this man (good or bad) and the love doesn't go away quickly. Remind yourself often of what he did - no matter how it hurts. Acknowledge the reality (I always followed the myth in the past). Let yourself grieve for this loss and then move on. I am trying as well and am with you!!
Have faith - it will get easier.
Hugs
Best of luck to you. ~~Hugs~~Sandy
he took the kids out for an hour yesterday,apparently he had more important things to do than spend more time with them saying goodbye.he asked them lots of questions about my life and told them that the youngest of ows kids dosent like him as she is finding things hard as her mum has had lots of serious relationships and apparently they always end up walking out on her.i must admit that it felt good to hear she isnt as perfect as he has lead me to believe.
im now trying to consontrate on my children and myself and in time hopefully it wont hurt as much,and yes i know i do deseve better and so do my children.xx