I think you answered your own question. Depending on someone for our sole happiness isn't easy or good for us as well as them. Think about the pressure it puts on somebody to be someone else's "all"?

If I were you, then I would allow myself to grieve. Feel the hurt, sorrow, etc. Allow yourself to work through the pain and heartache.

I wouldn't worry about or think about dating or finding someone...if you did, then you are either afraid to be alone or you are trying to pretend away your hurt feelings by replacing him with someone else.

Start making yourself enjoy activities YOU enjoy. Force yourself to get out there and do something random like cake decorating, or a book club, or a meet up group.

Yep, it sucks he moved on quickly. I know. But, the fact is, he did. And while he's moving on, you're stuck in uncharted territory. This is a prime opportunity to do and be whatever you want....you are MORE than someone else's accessory.

Jackie, I know exactly how you feel. That sinking feeling, that sensation of being empty, lost and worthless. And the worst : the feeling that you will never find love again.
Since I've been there, I know that there's nothing I could say that would really ease your pain. My friends all told me what I needed to hear but it didnt work. It's up to us to take back our happiness into our own hands and to start living.
I decided that the morning when I almost had a panick attack after a sleepless night. I couldnt breathe and I lost all control of myself. That day, I decided that life was too short to allow myself the luxury of living it so badly. The key to stop feeling anxious, obsessed and insecure is in us! Even though it's very normal after one month to feel sad and lonely, especially when you loved him this much, you have to convince yourself that everything is going to get better.

Make a list of all the things he did to treat you "less than adequately" and a list of all the great plans you can make for the future, all the people around you who love you, all the opportunities that life is ready to give you if you're willing to accept it.
We can talk in private if you want. Lots of hugs !!!

all i can say is that i am in the exact same place as u right now
i know how u r feeling,
its a horrible place to be & i dont know when i will ever get over this

sorry my message seems negative, were in the same boat
so im unable to give any advice apart from sympathy/empathy
bless your heart xx

Try to find a psychiatrist. They can give you meds to help. I went to one recently and they gave me something for the anxiety and it has helped. Also, reading books helped, too. I am reading a GREAT one right now "You Ex-Factor: Overcome heartbreak and build a better life" By Stephan Poulter. See if your library has it...I recommend it. IT gives us a lot of answers. Hang in there. I can't say that it gets easier....not yet, but know that you are still going through stages of the grief...you are exactly where you are supposed to be. Don't put too much pressure on yourself.

first of all your not pathetic. what you are feeling is natural. i felt the same way after me and my ex split the first time. i did some horrible things to myself, selfish things. spent a week in the hospital.

as for the future. dont dwell in "what will the future be?" you are still young, a whole life still awaits you. as for depending on someone else to complete you. you will never be complete until YOU complete YOU.

ive been with the same person for 20 years. when she left it felt like she took my soul with her. for 2 years i was scared about what my future held. ill never meet anyone. im too skinny and ugly for anyone to be attracted to. lots of things and fears crawling around in my head that made me feel low, made me feel i was the problem.

cry let it out. write what ever is on your mind down on paper. go pamper yourself to a massage, get your hair and nails done if you feel unattractive. live day to day. dont worry about the future. you need healing time.

Jackie, you have a giving heart. I know you are wanting to love and nurture him, but now that purpose and affirmation was taken from you. I totally understand that. And listen to you! You have already realized something that you don't want to continue and repeat. Good for you girl. Your right, depending on someone else for happiness is setting up to fail. Your a smart girl, young, with a ton to offer. Don't give up. I see so much potential in you, for being young, you are so self aware. That's awesome. It takes some people YEARS and repeating those kind of mistakes before they can change them. But you have the world ahead of you. :) Feeling so low sucks, but when your heart is broken, you have no energy and its hard to see any hope or future beyond the pain. You are strong and loving, you will come through this an even better person. HUG

jackiejolie I feel for you and your circumstance. i am sorry. my opionon about making a partner "happy" and needing someone to complete me may not be the ideal relationship (take my opionon with many grains of salt as my marriage just ended,)
but if you focus on kaking him happy and he focuses on making you happy, where is the growth and depth for a relationship, one has to acept some blemishish in the onther,
I think that wanting to see the best in the other and to try and give the other you best is what good relationships build upon.
I'm sure that i didn't live up to that as well as i could n should have.
As for why you feel so low... well that shows how much you did care about your partner (a good thing to care)
i'll keep a good thought for you.