Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I found an article for the parents of kids out there. I'm going to use this advice for my children.
June 22, 2007
Much of how children are affected depends on how their parents handle the divorce process. Parents who end their marriage in a mature and healthy way can reduce the negative effects of divorce on their children.
Being sensitive to how each child is reacting to and handling this difficult experience is also very important. Here are a few ways parents can help their children handle divorce.
Make certain the children understand they did not cause the divorce.
Explain to the children the reasons for the divorce, using common sense as a guide.
Allow the children to express their feelings about the divorce.
Do not lie or withhold information from the children that will help them better understand the reasons for the divorce.
Be sensitive to how each child is handling the divorce.
Help the children feel secure by showing love and commitment to them.
See that each childs behavior remains appropriate to his or her current stage of development.
Allow the children to adjust to the divorce at their own rates.
Help the children maintain their usual routines.
Set a good example for the children by handling the divorce in a mature and healthy way.
Determine custody based on a rational decision that meets the needs and best interests of the children.
Maintain regular contacts between the absent parent and the children.
Do not expect a child to fill the absent parents shoes.
Do not tamper with the childrens love or loyalty to the other parent.
Do not ask the children to take sides against the other parent.
Do not say bad things about the other parent.
Do not attempt to buy the childrens affections by playing weekend Santa.
Do not use the children as messengers or question them about the other parent.
Spend time alone with each child so that he or she will feel like a special individual.
June 22, 2007
Much of how children are affected depends on how their parents handle the divorce process. Parents who end their marriage in a mature and healthy way can reduce the negative effects of divorce on their children.
Being sensitive to how each child is reacting to and handling this difficult experience is also very important. Here are a few ways parents can help their children handle divorce.
Make certain the children understand they did not cause the divorce.
Explain to the children the reasons for the divorce, using common sense as a guide.
Allow the children to express their feelings about the divorce.
Do not lie or withhold information from the children that will help them better understand the reasons for the divorce.
Be sensitive to how each child is handling the divorce.
Help the children feel secure by showing love and commitment to them.
See that each childs behavior remains appropriate to his or her current stage of development.
Allow the children to adjust to the divorce at their own rates.
Help the children maintain their usual routines.
Set a good example for the children by handling the divorce in a mature and healthy way.
Determine custody based on a rational decision that meets the needs and best interests of the children.
Maintain regular contacts between the absent parent and the children.
Do not expect a child to fill the absent parents shoes.
Do not tamper with the childrens love or loyalty to the other parent.
Do not ask the children to take sides against the other parent.
Do not say bad things about the other parent.
Do not attempt to buy the childrens affections by playing weekend Santa.
Do not use the children as messengers or question them about the other parent.
Spend time alone with each child so that he or she will feel like a special individual.
deleted_user
In NJ after you file for divorce you go to a class on how to handle it and handle it with the kids. They have many people you can talk to with different groups.
deleted_user
There is also a childs rights.
deleted_user
thanks Rman...pretty common sense stuff - but, always good to have a refresher!...man, the one that gets to me the most is the "weekend santa!!!" GGGgggrrrr...
Rman
I just have to keep telling myself that it's the children that are most important. They never asked for this crap.
deleted_user
thanks for sharing. My STBX and I are required to go to at least one mediation session involving our two oldest children. We were told the two youngest are below the age where they would have any say in the matter.
Join the Conversation