It has been a while since I have posted to a forum asking for advice. Now I could really use some input. As some of you may remember, my wife and I separated Good Friday this year. She asked me to move out so she could figure things out. I did not want to do it, but trying to be a good husband I moved into an apartment nearby and have supported BOTH houses.

I found her lying to me about talking to a friend she knew from her childhood. Someone that is toxic to her. Being separated, alone, and now dealing with her lying put me in a emotional state where I really felt like I was on auto pilot. I filed for divorce, because I felt that if she was lying to me about this person she is likely lying to me about any number of things, and I had to protect my property and rights to see my kids. 

Since then, I have tried to reconcile. I calmed down, the hurt and anger changed to an understanding. But she wanted no part of it. Last week Thursday we had our first court date, for custody of our kids. She used a surgery that went wrong against me, which made me contemplate ending my life. I received help during that crisis, and have continued to see a therapist to help me better myself and for support. Even with that being thrown out there in court, the referee saw through it and I made a last attempt to try to reconcile. She was bitter mad, and disgusted with me, called me hurtful names etc. and wanted no part of it. So I decided then and there I was done trying. 

That following Sunday, I got a text from her asking me to help her with trimming the lawn. Since she has been mowing it, I figured I can do that. We worked together for the first time in a long time. It was nice, and I said I missed working with her as a team. Since I gave up the emotional investment, I decided to be nice for our kids sake. And they got to spend time with Mom and Dad together. 

That night I had to go to Chicago for training, and I included her with my parents and siblings of the fact I made it safely and sent pics of my wanderings to Navy Pier. We have kids togehter, they are younger so I did it because they worry about me since I am not around. I did it so she could show them soe of my life. Once down there, I talked to the kids on Skyp, and was able to send pics directly to their phone and no longer included her. By Tuesday she was mad that I was no longer sending any updates directly to her. Which I replied I knew she was helping the kids with their phones (so she saw them) and I did not think she cared, was I mistaken... She said Maybe. 

Today, she sends me a text that she wants to talk if I am willing. I asked about what. and she said things. I told her after what she said about me in court I really dont have anything to say to her, but I wanted to know what she was getting at.  Pressing further, she said to see if how and if we can work together. I again said what does that mean. She is leaving it at that. 

All I can surmise is that she now sees that the court is not going to give her sole custody. In fact they expanded my parenting time. She will not get the amount of child support she expected (hundreds less that what I thought I would have to pay), and wont likely get spousal support (she does work full time). I told her that I was planning on bringing realestate agents through soon to get an value on the house. 

To me I think she is realizing that the $ and assets she thought she was going to get are not the case. That she can't afford to keep our house (or buy me out), that everything I have told her is truthful. That she will go from living in a really nice area to a low income area. That our kids will have to be put in private schools because the area she can afford is not a good area. It feels like this is a tactic to get me to slow down the process or gather ammo to use against me in court. 

Frankly, If she hated me enough to say all that crap in court against me, why would she want to get back together with me?  I am struggling as that is my family and hate to tear everything we built apart. But after months of trying to reconcile and being told how terrible I am, using the most difficult time in my life against me in court took any desire I had away. I dont want to reconcile now, but I am trying to understand what may be going on in her head. 

Thoughts?