Being single for a while might be the best thing that could happen to you. You can find yourself again. You might joy know what you missed.

One of my biggest fears is being alone in the future. She was the one I wanted to grow old with.

I'm in same boat my husband of 20 years just left me for another woman and I'm miserable he's moved on and it is so horrible. I hope it does get better. I guess we just got to deal with it. It's the hardest thing I have ever been through.

Same with me.. my husband left me and is already in another relationship within a month..if I'm honest with my self I know he had to be talking to her while we were still living together. I'm so depressed I can't eat.. I just want this feeling of heartbreak to go away and to be able to move on .. happily

My husband told me he was leaving me in my late pregnancy with twins. I had to call my ob/gyn and have a c-section. this was 6 1/2 years ago. He left me to be with another woman actually. Yes time heals. I got to keep my children and have been blessed abundantly. Chose not to enter into a relationship yet but I dont regret it because my kids have been such a source of joy.

Wonj, I have been where you are and her relationship fell apart. We are currently trying to make things work for us. It may not, though I pray it will. Sometimes I wonder if I'm only making things harder on myself and setting myself up for more and more pain.

Focus on being the very best dad you can be. Be that constant love and reliable safety for them. Find time to purge the pent up emotions, and look for friends and family distractions.

You and your children are in my prayers. Be strong, brother.

Thank you for the advice.

It is hard, very hard. I am still trying to not cry at work and deal with the emotional aftermath of having the one you love walk out and right to someone else. This has been hurting me for a while now. I do hope it gets better and I keep hearing it does, but time is not moving fast enough through this for me.

Hang in there copingwith2!

Dear Friend,

I just found out that my husband of 15 years have been cheating on me with someone from work. He ended it and now trying to prove that he's devoted to me and he just wants to be with me. Whatever he's doing doesn't lessen the pain or stop the hurt. I felt like someone ripped out my organs and left me to die. So, I know how much you are hurting and how betrayed you are feeling right now. I have been there and still going through it. But only through our deepest pain, we see the light. I did all sorts of things to ease my pain and they ended up hurting me more than helped me. Then I resorted to one person who love me more than myself and that's not my parents or my family. I took refuge in Jesus. I know this may sounds cliche' or even silly to you. Stranger things have happened, for the first time I'm able to sleep without sleep aid, for the first time its stopped hurting, I'm now at peace, and found purpose. I pray that things get better for you and you will rise above the hurt and the pain, I am so sorry for what happened to you as no one deserve to be put through this kind of agony.

Wonj, if you’re feelings have overwhelmed your coping ability, seriously, get some professional help. There are a great deal of resources to help with this very issue and can give you a whole toolbox to help you with these feelings and to lead you along the path to accepting the reality of this situation. It WILL STOP hurting, but you decide how soon or how long you’ll be in mourning for your marriage. If you continue to hang on to this idea of her and how she might come back, you’re only hurting yourself Wonj.

Your children deserve your attention, their confident and together father…use this as a motivator to get some help and redesign your life! You don’t sound like someone who quits, you’ll get through this, but it won’t be easy and you’ll need support. Keep reaching out, it’ll get better once you decide to let her go (emotionally), and realize that you deserve better than this.

Wonj - I have been where you are. No doubt about it - it sucks. My wife cheated with her boss. What I found so stunning was how quickly she just disconnected from our life together. It was like a switch flipped in her head, and she just mentally checked out. She turned the page, and every happy memory of us and our beautiful family just evaporated. In the space of a few hours, she rented an apartment, we told our children and family, and *poof* she was gone. Not surprisingly, her boss was not quite as committed to her as she had expected. He promptly dumped her, and then fired her. (Now... To finish my story, we have since reconciled and managed to put "that rough patch" behind us.)

I am so sorry this has happen to you. I will NEVER understand whether relationship or marriage of how they can throw you away like a piece of trash as if you never even mattered and move on like it's nothing. That baffles me.

Thank you all for your reply and advice!