Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Koko 12/31/2016

About to fall asleep and it's not even 10pm here! My Stbx was gone most of the week while my mom and sister were in town and we were busy running around with my kids going to the planetarium, ice skating, shopping, staying at a hotel in downtown etc. But my mom and sister are leaving tomorrow and I am already feeling the loneliness and afraid of being a single parent. My kids are only 8 and 4 so it's been pretty hectic keeping them busy and not going too wild out in public but I had their help this week. I used to have my husband help out but it will all be me now. How do people handle the stress of becoming a single parent!? Hopefully I figure it out and have a better 2017!?

mirandac 12/31/2016

Happy New Years to you too, HUGS

mynewnormal 12/31/2016

you can do this, it will be challenging, but you can do it : ) Just take baby steps, you don't need to go out on big adventures right away, your family needs to reconfigure is all - and it will happen naturally over time. Just one outing at a time : ) I also have 2 littles, but different scenario, I didn't feel anxiety once my ex and I divorced, because he was never there anyway - I felt like a single parent for years, before it became so. Try to plan ahead as much as you can, pack up the car with 'emergency must haves'.. one person vs two is a big difference.. the benefit? its your call, no more compromising, no more arguing, if you want to do it - its getting done : ) enjoy the process, and I'm sure your relationships with your kids will just continue to grow closer and closer because of it - baby steps : )

LearningwhoiamKB36 01/01/2017

Handling everything on my own is so scary for me too but I know with time, I will be OK & get use to it. I just 1st need a car & to start work. I wasn't working BC I have a 2 yr old. The plan was to stay at home with the baby. Once he turns 3 put him in school. By that time he would be able to talk and express himself fully if something was wrong. I think it would be easier for me to move on if I had a job & a car.

jojored 01/01/2017

Koko, just like mynewnormal, my husband wasn't there for most outings I took with the kids. Even if he was physically there, he never planned or packed for outings, usually didn't even have an opinion of where we went and what we did, and always would disappear for cigarette breaks. He was like a third child, but worse - he would take off and not tell me.

I managed to take the kids to NYC by myself a few times over the years, since they were about 8 and 10. Those were big trips, with train rides, subway rides, figuring out how to get around NYC, finding places to eat. It was fun, a blast, we all enjoyed those trips. The best trip was a visit to DC, using hotel points I won while in the audiance of the Dr. Oz show. We took a train and the entire weekend walked around and made memories. We did the local stuff, the day trips, pretty easily. It does take lots of planning and forethought, but you can do it. I've been doing it essentially since the day they were born. Post divorce will be no different.

My kids are 16/18, so my sadness is the fact that there are no more trips iceskating or to the planetarium. My 18 year old will do things in a heartbeat with me (but he's off at college for the most part), but the 16 year old, not so much. A little too much like his dad. I miss those days when they were your kids' ages. I do remember how hard it is to deal with 4 & 8's, and I never quite got it when people would tell me to enjoy the chaos because soon they will be grown....but that's true. So, try to enjoy the chaos!

Koko 01/01/2017

Thank you. I know it's a chaotic age but also good for me mentally since I don't have too much time moping around about my failed marriage. My stbx has been a good father - yes I planned all the outings and packed everything but he was very involved in taking the kids to various things and watching over them. It's just the extra set of hands that I miss when the two kids run in opposite directions!!

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