I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through.

Divorce can really have such a big impact on our emotions and how we feel. It's not something we can easily get over.

You're grieving and that's totally normal. You suffered a great loss.

And no one can tell you exactly how long you should be grieving.

Allow yourself to cry. And to scream if you want to. You might even get angry or blame yourself but remember it isn't your fault.

Give yourself time to grieve long enough until you finally heal and eventually you will

Thank you.

I completely relate to you at the moment. I'm 5 weeks into separation after 13 years and started divorce proceedings. Thought I'd feel stronger than this but truth is like said above, you need to allow yourself to grieve and feel all emotions. That maybe sadness, hopelessness, regret, anger, blame, fear of the future etc. I have found these emotions go round and round. If it's any consolation, I have had to take time from work and have struggled to do basic things for myself. You are going through a major loss and it shakes your very core self. I'm reassured by many who have been through this that is WILL get better with time. I hang onto this every day and hope it to be true.

How long were you together? Who decided to end things if not both of you? Do you have any friends and/or family who can support you? You might find speaking to your GP helpful or a therapist?
The road is long but it's important to keep putting one foot in front of the other until you start to feel better gradually.
Take care of yourself xx

I am also going through a divorce currently. I have moved back to my parents for a while, which is 3 hours from my current home. The judge awarded my husband custody bc she didn't want to uproot my kids due to school. I get that but I feel devastated. I miss my husband. I am the one that ultimately messed it up for us. We have had problems over the 14 years but we got through them. I was to a point I thought I wanted out and wanted someone else. In turn I made the biggest mistake and it took it to realize I have the love of my life at home. But I hurt him. I am going through depression now because of it and I feel so alone. I hope you can find some happiness. I feel like I have nothing to look forward to either. Like how do I ever move on from this. I joined this group to try to relate to the members and try to find some understanding. I hope all the best as you continue to move forward with your life. This is hard. Very hard.

I am too. This has been only a little over a week..and I feel like I can't breathe. I can't eat or sleep or do anything. My heigene just disappeared. I don't seem to do anything but rethink over and over again. I feel like I wish I could find a friend who is feeling the same and can talk to.

Thank you everyone, its really a dark time for me. I am told by my therapist that this is normal. I wish it were not so,but unfortunately it is. I was with my husband for 22 years. I decided that it was best for me to move on. I have two sisters who are supportive of my decision. It was a long time coming. I have to learn life all over again.
This time I am older and have to learn how this world works since the pandemic and all that we have been going through.
I also need someone to talk to about many things in life.

Yes my therapist says the same about grief and loss. Being the one to have made the decision to leave does not make the grief any less painful. I felt strong when I made the decision to leave my marriage but completely fell apart once I ha done it….still feel I am in pieces and need to put myself back together somehow.
Had you wanted to leave the marriage for quite some time or was it a sudden realisation? Feeling grief does not mean you made the wrong decision, just that you are human and it will take time and soil searching to process it all and heal which you will do. Good that you have sisters who understand your decision and support you.