Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
My stbx and I had a conversation on the phone the other night for an hour and a half! No yelling, just talking. I told him my reasons for leaving him, besides the finances. I think he really listened to me this time.
Then we got onto the topic of custody. I told him I was going for full, and he said he would fight me for joint. He thinks I want the power over him and our kids. He also told me all his "friends" told him not to let me get full, and that they would kill him if he let me do it.
Then I told him the benefits I could reap if I had full custody. Single mom, full custody of two small children, and now a care taker to my 77 yr old mother who is on oxygen. So, he says he will look into if what I am saying is true, and might give me full custody, but not to tell anybody.
My problem is this...the good conversation, the no yelling, had me thinking he might want to see where things go..or at least its a start. Then the custody came up and I thought he really does want this divorce.
I know I left him, and I know I dont want to live like that any more, but why does the heart play these games on you? And the head? Why does the head let you think these things?
Am I reading too much into this? Should I just go on with my life like I have been and try not to worry about what he thinks or does? It really is driving me crazy!
Then we got onto the topic of custody. I told him I was going for full, and he said he would fight me for joint. He thinks I want the power over him and our kids. He also told me all his "friends" told him not to let me get full, and that they would kill him if he let me do it.
Then I told him the benefits I could reap if I had full custody. Single mom, full custody of two small children, and now a care taker to my 77 yr old mother who is on oxygen. So, he says he will look into if what I am saying is true, and might give me full custody, but not to tell anybody.
My problem is this...the good conversation, the no yelling, had me thinking he might want to see where things go..or at least its a start. Then the custody came up and I thought he really does want this divorce.
I know I left him, and I know I dont want to live like that any more, but why does the heart play these games on you? And the head? Why does the head let you think these things?
Am I reading too much into this? Should I just go on with my life like I have been and try not to worry about what he thinks or does? It really is driving me crazy!
He texts back saying
"its too early. we have had these b4. we will see when a prob comes up and how we react. talk is cheap"
What is he saying? Please give some feedback people!!!
No, nothing has changed. In fact, I just got a letter from the collection co that holds the mortgage that he owes $19,573.74 by Jan 17th or they will start foreclosure again! You are right Tsand, but I think we all do it.
My x & I got along great in the beginning and even were intimate a few times, until I told him I was not giving him any more money. Then the fighting began, now we can't even discuss the kids without yelling and he even has me swearing back at him on the phone. He has threatened to have the kids taken from me twice, because I was upset.
Before you do anything you need to wait and the truth will manifest.
Reconciliation has crossed my mind a few times when I focused on the positive, but then I remember rest. If you are meant to be together it will happen, but you don't want to jump right back in and hurt that much more if it isn't right!!
Take care.
Words of wisdom by Dr. Phil