Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,009 Members

100,360 Posts

0 Online

enough50 05/18/2015

I just wondered if others experience this. Sometimes I feel so happy, so free about my break up that I feel like I'll never feel sad again. Then other times, like today, I feel so sad and pained that it didn't work - feel like I'll never feel happy again. Of course I know that I will feel both ways again. I know its grief and how it works. It just really sucks that it didn't work out, that I had to break up a marriage, but I was dying inside. Tonight I feel like I still love her and long for her companionship and touch but I know it can't be. She's a wonderful woman but we just weren't happy togther. My logical mind knows it had to be but my heart tonight is re breaking for her and our relationship. Oh the wierdness of break up and love, its so different at times. Makes me realize why the decission to break up was so hard because the feelings are still so strong. Can anyone relate to this.

ChiTownBear 05/18/2015

Of course we have all been at the park on this roller coaster. and if I am honest with myself, I would say that "I know we weren't good together" even tho at the time, I have fought to keep the relationship together because I, myself, don't want to believe that we weren't good together. I can be good with anyone, right? :)

but we find, its not true and the hardest part is accepting it and allowing ourselves to be Ok with it so to move on. It takes time and its different for everyone when they get to that point they reach when they find themselves just leaving it in the past and moving on.

You will get off that roller coaster only to find yourself on a different ride. Make the most out of all the rides, whether scary, good or bad. Its what builds you in to, You.

lisainthevalley 05/18/2015

Yes, yes and yes! It's a roller coaster. Some days I feel happy and at peace and think I've got it all sorted out...until I wake up once more in the depths of despair, just so sad that it's over.

jbuck 05/19/2015

Yes, I can absolutely relate! One thing I just recently learned is that when going through ups and downs I don't need to share anything with her..the other person may not experience this at the same time, or at all. I had told my ex a few things I was going through and she managed to redirect it back toward me as if my pain I'm losing the relationship was instability or inconsistency. That hurt.

It is a very hard decision.

kristinch1 05/19/2015

I'm sure we all feel like that sometimes. i know I did this very morning. I went from rage to almost tears and now as I'm typing this I'm back to emotionally stable and ok with the break up. Lucky for me I left my cell phone at home this morning so I can't text and I can stay at no contact. That's how you heal long term. I say come here when you feel that way and we will talk you down to reality. It's going to be okay!!!!!!!! Hugs . You are not alone

Chris198I 05/20/2015

i understand. i have been on a rollercoaster of emotions too. it's hard, it really is. when we try to find a balance, and then there's another rough day. i know what you're going through.i went through it a lot, for 2 months, i still am, and not sure, what the future holds. being good to ourselves, and treating our health right, is very important during these times.

enough50 05/21/2015

Thanks all for validating my experience. I was pretty sure its normal but just nice to hear sometimes that others feel similar. Sometimes I still feel the attraction and forget all about why we're divorcing and then other times its all so very clear :). I guess thats the way it goes. She is someone I deeply loved and sometimes I still feel connected to that feeling. The love was real and true and makes sense that there will be times it resurfaces. Now again, I'm more in touch with why we can't be together and why I'm so happy we're apart. Funny eh :)

broken234 05/21/2015

I totally understand how you feel. Most days I realize that I deserve better than my cheating husband. I know that I could never trust him again. But some days I long for his touch and embrace. Some days I just want to hear him tell me he loves me again. I wish it wasn't that way to grieve my marriage ending. I wish it were easier.

sja 05/21/2015

I've felt that way also, many times and after many breakups. One day at a time, and try not to over-analyze your feelings, and just let them be there.

Join the Conversation