Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hello fellow hearts in repair,
I have recently ended a 4.5 yr relationship. We have broken up in the past and gone for short periods of time without speaking but this time was different. I finally realized that I was beating my head against a wall by trying to make it work with someone who was either unwilling or didn't have the capacity to do the same and how much damage I had incurred by remaining in the relationship. There was not even any contact on Christmas. It is painful but necessary I guess. It was a toxic rollercoaster and was really over long before making it official. I I am trying so hard to keep busy and I know that this is for the best but it doesnt make it hurt any less. I think what hurts the most is that we've known eachother from childhood and it took me all this time to see that he's not even a friend so I cant keep someone like that in my life in any capacity. I even blocked his calls so that he cant leave a voicemail for me to hear his voice and run back like every other time. Its like someone who i've known for 25 yrs has just died. New Years is coming up and because I'm feeling down and trying to process all of this I'm not really feeling like doing anything. Someone said I should let myself feel whatever i'm feeling instead of trying to avoid it but I definitely dont want to be emotional if I'm out and also dont want to be crying or angry sitting at home... man its never a good time but I think the holidays make it worse...
Anyone have any words of wisdom?
Thank you and a Happy, Healing, and Healthy New Year to everyone!
I have recently ended a 4.5 yr relationship. We have broken up in the past and gone for short periods of time without speaking but this time was different. I finally realized that I was beating my head against a wall by trying to make it work with someone who was either unwilling or didn't have the capacity to do the same and how much damage I had incurred by remaining in the relationship. There was not even any contact on Christmas. It is painful but necessary I guess. It was a toxic rollercoaster and was really over long before making it official. I I am trying so hard to keep busy and I know that this is for the best but it doesnt make it hurt any less. I think what hurts the most is that we've known eachother from childhood and it took me all this time to see that he's not even a friend so I cant keep someone like that in my life in any capacity. I even blocked his calls so that he cant leave a voicemail for me to hear his voice and run back like every other time. Its like someone who i've known for 25 yrs has just died. New Years is coming up and because I'm feeling down and trying to process all of this I'm not really feeling like doing anything. Someone said I should let myself feel whatever i'm feeling instead of trying to avoid it but I definitely dont want to be emotional if I'm out and also dont want to be crying or angry sitting at home... man its never a good time but I think the holidays make it worse...
Anyone have any words of wisdom?
Thank you and a Happy, Healing, and Healthy New Year to everyone!
This will also be my first single NYE in years. I chose to take the time in between Christmas and New Years off of work, so that I'd be with my family instead of home with friends knowing he's around somewhere. I want to be able to be a mess of I need to be. I've been trying to think of the new year as a chance to really start focusing on the new life I will be making for myself... but I'me having trouble getting there. Sending you positive thoughts and I hope everyone gets through the rest of the holidays intact.
Frankly, I recommend it. It would feel way too depressing to just stay home by myself, drinking cheap wine and watching TV; And it would feel totally awkward for me to hang out with friends. So, instead, I go to a restaurant/bar by myself, and I can "be" anybody that I want!
I have every NYE alone. I just stay home and enjoy it. I have a bottle of Moet in the fridge if I feel the urge tonight - but I don't think I will.
I just don't see the big deal with it.
Peace