Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
A quick run through. My first husband had an affair after being together 8 years.... While trying to heal met my second husband who I thought was my soulmate and we would never part. Out of the blue he left me last March, two days later he moved in with the ow! he met her at uni and I was supporting him everyway possible. We were together 12 years
Im struggling to cope with the fact they are still together, they are using his money he got for the sale of the home to travel all over the world. In between uni!
it's difficult to deal with. It came out the blue and ten months later I'm still trying to deal with it. The hurt is something I can't even begin to explain. I still feel physically sick, cry at night, back on happy pills......
I can't cope with them splashing around how happy they are when he has left me in so much pain? He was the love of life! However could he?
Everyone says he is in a uni bubble, and I was just in his way right now.
What annoys me is.... I wouldn't take him back as he has treated me so bad. So what do I want? Why can't I move on? I hate thinking about them both all the time. It's driving me crazy.
Im struggling to cope with the fact they are still together, they are using his money he got for the sale of the home to travel all over the world. In between uni!
it's difficult to deal with. It came out the blue and ten months later I'm still trying to deal with it. The hurt is something I can't even begin to explain. I still feel physically sick, cry at night, back on happy pills......
I can't cope with them splashing around how happy they are when he has left me in so much pain? He was the love of life! However could he?
Everyone says he is in a uni bubble, and I was just in his way right now.
What annoys me is.... I wouldn't take him back as he has treated me so bad. So what do I want? Why can't I move on? I hate thinking about them both all the time. It's driving me crazy.
I agree with clearskye that you must work to resist torturing yourself by making up stories about your husband. You don't know for sure what's going on & given that he is a proven cheater, no matter what is happening now, this is who he is & who the ow has chosen to be with...a sneaky, lying, cheater.
I am struggling with my H having recently left me as well (I don't know if there's someone else or not). I totally relate to what you're saying about how you wouldn't take him back, but you can't let go...people keep telling me this takes time. Time & some effort. You can't force it, you have to grieve, but you need to gently nudge yourself toward building your own life without him too.
Are you seeing friends & partaking in hobbies? Maybe you don't want to, but if you're not, you must TRY. I am doing this, sometimes I have a good time & forget for a minute...sometimes I'm eager to get back home so I can cry in private. I do think building a community around you is really important.
I'm sorry that you both are going through the same. Why do people treat others this way? I would never hurt anyone like he has done to me.
Total melt down and low confidence now. Thank you for your time and comments they did help
I didn't think I would ever make it but I did, he left in Feb 2014, divorced me in Jan 2015. It has been the hardest thing I've ever been through but I am doing pretty good, still some rough spots but I am healing, happy and ready to start my new chapter. I am 54 so it's kind of scary starting over but I have no choice, like so many of us here.
You need to find ways to let it go, the longer you stew and dwell on him and OW, it just delays the healing process. A few quotes that got me through:
*Stop looking in the rear view mirror, you're not going that direction.
*I will live the life that is given.
*I can do hard things.
*We deserve better.
*Its not the end of the world.
Hang in there, time really does heal. Hugs!!
But I am trying my very best to move forward. I appreciate comments though it helps. Thank you. I wish you all the best.