Can you have a sit down with him and possibly explain how you feel before you blindside him with divorce/separation? Maybe give him a chance to get off the medications and improve himself. I too was on Paxil when my wife left and I tell ya that crap turned me into zombie. It was difficult getting off it but I was able to and my emotions and libido returned. If he knows you're serious about leaving he may straighten up. I never got the chance as my ex wife had planned her exit so wasn't hearing any reconciling plans..

I feel for both of you.

I was on antidepressants briefly.

I know some claim they'd be dead without them, but they made my life 110℅ worse.

Never taking another psych med again.

You both deserve to be happy and I do hope you can work out whatever would be beneficial for the both of you.

What has been done to fix the situation ?

I realize your husband is not me and I don't know the details about your relationship... but since I have a good idea of what it is like to be in his skin - I had 9 surgeries in 3 years - if my partner of 20 years said they wanted a divorce because I m not the same person I used to be, I m not sure what kind of reaction I would have.
I understand your point too... I lived in sexless marriage before...: but It really sounds like you are leaving because of his illness and it struck a nerve with me because most of the time staying alive with severe chronic pain and not blowing your brains out is a full time job in itself and part of the reason he hasn't done that yet is likely because of you.
I m certainly still around only because of my children. However, I work and I do have a relationship, but I am one of the few who can function so highly with everything I have going on medically and emotionally. .

I m not saying this to guilt-trip you, I m just trying to explain that he HASN'T given up because he is still here.

Anyway. I hope that your divorce will give him a push to try harder and give you both happiness your deserve to have.

kkbcoop77 - I have sat down and talked with him about getting off his medications, and how it has affected his personality. But he said, he cannot get off of his meds, as he needs them for his pain. I know how he feels, I was in the same boat. I was on 2 pain meds, anti-depressants and anti-anxiety meds. I went to see a medicinal cannabis doctor who prescribed me cannabis oil. I am now off all of my prescription meds and feel a whole lot better. He doesn't want to seem to take this route. I can't force him to love me or show affection. So I think I am at the end of the road and need to move on.

Anytime a depression is in the play, counseling may also be worth considering. Also, willl a brief separation to allow you both to self assess and prioritize something worth considering?

Sometimes having the personal space allows a person to self examine and see things more clearly - like I truly love this person and I want to enhance my life to be able give love to the person I care to have in my life.

My husband of 15 years suffers from chronic pain and chronic depression. He too takes opioids for pain and a handful of psych meds to keep the depression at bay. We haven't been sexually intimate in several years. We have weathered some major storms together. At times, it has been very difficult for me, to see the man I love withdraw into a world of pain and depression and shut me out. But I know "this too will pass". When he comes out of a depressive cycle, even for a short period, he is able to show emotion, love and affection. It is than that I realize that he always loves, honors, respects and cherishes me; but his pain and depression prevent him from showing it at times. I also realize that even though I can't "see" his illnesses, they are as real as any physical ailment. Would I walk away from him if he had cancer, Parkinson's disease, Alzheimer's disease? I would hope not.

I agree with Aronia. Sometimes, just making it through the day takes all he has to give and is a victory.

I would try to get an appointment with a Dr. specializing in medication and their interactions. Go ask your family Dr. who they would recommend.

Let your significant other know you want to go to the appointment with them to discuss options. Let them know you are WITH THEM in this and want to see if there are medications that can take care of the problem without the side effects.

After reading all the thoughtful wise responses you have received to your post, I have very little to add to the conversation. I would think it would be helpful to both of you to sit down and talk again about your options, i.e. whether to go back to a pain management doctor to look at different medical options and let him know that you are considering a legal separation not so much that you want a divorce but that you can no longer accept the status quo despite your concern and love for him. Spirtitually, I would pray that his mind and heart would be prepared ahead of time before you approach this conversation so that he can hear what is being said without being defensive. My prayers are with you.