I’m so sorry you are going through this. You seem like a caring person. I think sometimes people react to trauma in ways like this. I had a friend whose husband got into an accident and after he recovered from it he told her he wanted out. Was the person she had the emotional affair with also a cancer survivor? Whatever the reason I am very sorry you are hurting. Just concentrate on your kids and you can get through it.

It was a coworker who is not working there anymore, someone who has a wife with 4 young boys. Yes I’m a very caring person who work 8hrs a day, come home to my family, I’m the one who cook, clean, wash clothes, but the lawn and everything, yes I have made mistakes in the marriage but I’m a faithful man.

Sounds like we are the in the same boat. I work full time and do all of the housework, cooking, child care and I have also been taking college classes. It can be difficult to carry that much of the load. I wish I had more of a partner.

i'm sad for your children & you.
people never know who they really are until the shit hits the fan
it hit for your wife,,, and she's off in her own head
it's hit for you, and you are trying keep yourself pulled together so that you provide for your kids, don't doubt yourself, don't guilt up, you are trying to catch your wife as she falls but she's jumping
maybe her head is all turned with fear and some time and space will allow her to get her head turned around
i'll hold a good thought for your whole family & you

My Fear is not having my kids at home everyday and nights, I love spending quality time with them. My daughter is 10 years old and my boy is 5, they don’t know what is going on, they just know that I try to do the best things for them. My heart is getting eaten from the inside.

Hi boribori

I am very sorry. You are definitely in a tough situation, and your story brings back to mind my previous marriage. When it was in decline, my wife wanted nothing to do with me. It was a big pill for me to swallow. As an over-prideful former Marine, and an equally prideful 10 year law enforcement officer, this was not sitting well with me. I was called to something bigger than myself, and although it did not change my marriage outcome, it did make me a better person. There are some things I wish I knew that may have equipped me to cope with the change. I will pray that your marriage is both saved and restored to what it was intended to be. Be well.

Outlook2018

Hi boribori,
Sorry for the pain- Now being a lady I just want to dive in a little when you said
that she had an emotional affair although you had been there every minute throughout her cancer.You may have been there physically but being there emotionally is a little different. Like your normal being there emotionally maybe just did not suffice - you would never believe the swirl of emotions that are in your head with a cancer diagnosis. Part of her emotional pain stems from-that now she is looked at as broken,tainted and she turned to
someone who in her mind she did not have those burdening thoughts about.
It can get better with counseling. You can make it through. Be encoraged.
Vent and talk talk talk in this forum you can get alot of support also Best of Luck- positive energy and focus on the positive moments with the kids!!!

The emotional affair started about a year before her cancer, I found about very thing four months into her cancer treatment. She shutdown on me the same day she found out about her cancer. I was there for every single second, but she didn’t see me. She had blamed me for her cancer, and but she also think her cancer came from karma from the affair. I’m not a perfect man but I was the man that every woman want, even my mother in law have mentioned to me. All I will like is to work with our issues and enjoy our kids and life.

pretty shitty comment osheana