Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hi there im a mother of 4 children i was in a physically abusive relationship for 10 years had 2 beautiful children with the guy . He used to punch me giving me black eyes that I wore dark make up on so my kids wouldn't see . Choke me till I blacked out yell swear every profanity at me . Control every situation had no friends and he moved us so far away from any family I felt like I had no help anywhere. He usex to tell me if I ever called the cops he would kill me in our bathtub and wash every bit of evidence down the drain. No one would ever no. He punched my 4 front teeth out no end to how badly he treated me. I felt by then stuck and no one to turn to . Finally I googled domestic violence and found that I fit the categories. He asked me if I would marry him I said no he then told me to pack my things and get out I went upstairs to and he trapped me in our bedroom with no way out he forced me to have sex then cause I cried he began choking me I could not breath or talk or see I thought this was the end and I was going to die. He then for some reason let go. I fell to the floor gasping for my last breath I thought. He then went back to normal went to work the next day and I then waited to hear that he made it to work to pack all I could in our only fix truck picked up my kids and never looked back. Since leaving I was single for 2years then met a guy I thought deeply loved me missed all the abuse signs due to getting no help the first time around cause nothing is covered counselling wise due to cross province. We remained together for 5 years having 2 more beautiful babies. I've learned that he was an lifelong addict and emotionally abusive . He overdosed one day in my and kids home causing my kids to be apprehended. I worked doing all my worker wanted and come to court got the older 2 kids returned home with no safety concerns. Then by next court day my worker through me under the bus and threw my younger 2 babies into foster care even though they were at home with me and the 2 older kids doing great happy healthy and no issues I had a in home support worker coming each day. So now in very discouraged and feel emotionally worse than before . I don't no where to go or why my worker would do such a thing. My kids have always been my no one and everything to me . My worker also says that due to me being in 2 abusive relationships I have a lot of baggage. But I don't understand why put my babies in foster care they were never mistreated or neglected or anything. I feel for my babies they must be lost scared and confused I've always been there for them till. Nov. 10 when they removed them putting them into foster care.
You really need to see a counselor and let them help you get to a good place, not so you can get your kids back but just because you are a human being who deserves to be respected and has the right to say no to abuse. You are likely to continue making the same mistakes about men unless you get help.
I'm sorry for the tremendous amounts of abuse you've suffered. No one deserves that. It worries me that you spent so long with each of your abusers. You need a good therapist and some time to heal.
Focus on spending time with your grown children. Find a hobby, something you can really enjoy, that makes you happy and throw yourself into it. Try to visualize what kind of relationship you want for yourself in the future. Plan in advance how you will handle the red flags when they come up. Keep doing what you're doing. I wish nothing but good things for you!