Yes. Yes. When I hear about his gf (who doesn't work) having the BEST of everything while I'm scrimping and saving to buy my kids school clothes...

The dumbazz would SCREAM at me for spending money (and I work) while he apparently spoils her rotten...yeah...doesn't sit well with me. And he's trying to have his CS lowered.

yeah I can imagine how my x has the problem (me) behind and totally changed her character to suit this "new life" I wonder how long before the chrade stops and the real her comes out, not that people can't change and i am bitter and resentfull , but I wonder about the stop follow effect, of geographic cures , kinda like that no matter where one goes the real always follows, but yeah im mad as hell sometimes and sad that the only one gettin burned is me heh hating them is killing me like i heard a woman say at a meeting "like eating poison and expecting them to die " lol :(

still wondering if your stbx and mine are related somehow.Only mine goes for big toys and his house looks like a pig stye.If I were the neighbors I'd complain.He buys things like a 42k truck...timeshares....classes for realestate(can't read or write past 2nd grade level)and goes out of state to take the classes...and STILL crys poor...yeah right....and tells me what I see isn't what I see...huh?wth?

I understand how you feel. My last relationship goes on canoeing trips, to NASCAR races, has parties that last days and is living in a house that he really can't afford. I look at it this way, he may be doing things to look good with the newbie but how long will that last? I feel that there are bills that are not getting paid in order to do all the fun stuff because when we were together, we had to pinch pennies to go out to eat and do things with the kids. There is no way that with his income and mine together, and us having to scrape up every dime, that he can get along with his income and her's which is about half of mine. There has to be something wrong going on there. Don't look at it as the grass got greener when they got together. There is a snake in that well manicured lawn and some moles that they just don't know about. They will forget to water the plants and flowers and they will die. You on the other hand, can be happy with one plant and nurture it and it will last forever. Don't always think that it's always better on the other side!! I have to remind myself of that alot!! :)

The best thing to do I would say, is give YOURSELF everything that was denied to you when you were married, and forget about his lawn, unless you happen to be driving by one night, and feel the urge to take a dump on it. LOL! Maybe you could put it in one of those nice potted plants as fertilizer?

While it IS annoying, I would tend more to your garden and look less at his. I hit up all my gardner friends for free plants in the spring and fall when it's time to divide.

And remember, while his flowers may LOOk beautiful it doesn't mean he is happy or having a better life than you. Just my 2-cents. Hugs to you...

I can relate....flowers are an extravagance for me to. I'm a professional weed grower. I do have a couple of shovels if you would like some help with flower replanting? Wink...wink

What got me really mad was that I lived without a lot, like you, because we were always financially struggling in our earlier years, and he continued to give me the same amount of money for the bills for many years. I went without a washer or dryer for at least 10 years when they broke. My bathrooms are pulled apart because he never finished re-tiling. The deck isn't finished. Everything was about not having enough money. He wouldn't give the kids 5 bucks for gas when they were teens without a big hassle. When I found out about his whore habit, which is costly in itself, and then the things he spent money on - rental car for one whore, she had an accident, he had to pay for the damages, thousands in jewelry, trip to Disneyworld, concert tickets, and god knows what else he gave them - well I was damn mad, hurt, angry, steamed, pissed, you name it. He came into $80,000 from the sale of his parent's house, and blew $60,000 in 3 months before we reconciled in '04. I'm sure the whores were eating it up and taking him for all he was worth. It's scary to see a man who was always so cheap just lose his mind like that. I hope he rots in hell.

Are you kidding??????????????????????????? I'd like to rub his nose in his 5 barn cats sh*t!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( He just got finished bragging to his daughter via text that THEY have five barn cats...) guess he's forgotten that HE has two children and a grandson that he's never seen.

Yup..two of the three things that bothered me in my marriage was.. Her smoking. Her daughter not having a drivers license and her not working. Well after two months of being divorced. My STBX stopped smoking after 27 years...and the daughter got her drivers license...Hum..sucks..if this was fixed...I wouldn't be on this site..But I love it so I stay!

we always had the best of everything!
whatever was newest and best we had..he'll also be taking over about 54K in debt in the divorce because of it..

since i dont know what i'll get in the divorce..been shopping at good will big lots ect..he wouldnt let me go to those kind of stores..thats where those people shop..i actually am having a blast digging thru things and finding treasures..

As most of you know, he was injured in an accident, (totally his own fault) and lost sight in one eye. When I wanted to go for assistance, he wouldnt let me. No food stamps, nothing. He was/is too proud. Lets see where his pride gets him now!

Pride comes before a fall, so they say...

Yeah...I destroyed my feet and hands to bring money home to pay for "necessities" of life cuz he wouldn't provide.Now I'm told I'm worth nothing(cuz I left). Yeah...doesn't make sense to me...but wth

Pride comes before a fall???? I'm so screwed!!! I understand where you are coming from diemjs. My x has a way of doing the same thing to me. Like spending time with his other two kids and never seeing the babies, not even calling when the baby boy was in the hospital! But taking his other son camping.

Back to the subject... Take time for yourself and do something for yourself. Add a new plant to your desk or create a window box, make your own little garden. Make your own happiness. Screw that jerk!