I very much feel your pain. I do not want a divorce either. My husband left 2 months ago. He insists that we need to get divorced. I decided that I loved him enough to give him what he thinks he wants. I went to the attorney's office (crying the whole way there and home) and had them draw up papers. His was mailed to him and all he had to do was fill out an affidavit, get it notarized, and return it. We are going the dissolution route. So far, he has not returned the papers to the attorney. Its been a month. Maybe he isn't in as big of a hurry as he thought? Maybe men are just procrastinators when it comes to paperwork? If you feel that you need to get something started with the attorney in order to move forward, I suggest you call and make an appointment. You can even just do a consultation if you think it would make you feel like you were at least taking some sort of action. Its a tough one. Like you, I'm still madly in love with my husband.

I just don't understand why they aren't the ones doing the paperwork? I mean it's not that I care about the actual effort of doing the paper work it's the emotional pain that comes with having to do this when it's not what I want. He has excuses and reasons to procrastinate as well.

Divorce is so emotionally draining. I feel your pain. I’ve been there. It must be even more difficult when children are involved. My heart goes out to you. If you don’t want the divorce, then don’t file papers. Since he says he does, he needs to be the one to do so. That seems like the only reasonable thing that can be expected. I’ll say a prayer for you. And know that a hug comes with it.

I am in the same boat as you are. Love my husband unconditionally. He also says he wants a divorce and never files. Its very hard and can tale a toll on you physically, mentally, and emotionally. Its almost like if we file they won't feel as guilty for asking for one.

That was brave of you to go file yourself. I too have thought about doing this because it is becoming very draining. Marriage isn't easy and I commend you for wanting to make it work. Wish you the best of luck that you two can work it out. Stay strong.

So that when they regret or when talking to another girl they want to go to bed with, they play pitiful and earn their sympathy by pushing the blame on you. Tell me about it. How to rely on them for your happiness?

U think they will regret? Maybe, but mainly for losing the benefits of you not really you. Men decided.

Thank you all for the encouragement

I am so bewildered by the evasiveness when it comes to the paperwork as well. My husband married 23yrs together 28.5 left our children and I to move 5 states away with his male lover 3.5 months ago. He will not accept the divorce summons after 3 attempts. I do not understand this at all and i am so ANGRY! He has a partner whom he claims to be the "love of his life" and he left me to do it all, financially, emotionally, physically. We were best friends or so I thought until d day 6 months ago. Why is he making this so difficult? He has been "sorry I hurt you" and " I will take responsibility." "I'm a looser." Yet he refuses to cooperate.

Brookie: My brother refused to file for divorce for 10 years. Turns out he didn't want his live in girlfriend to begin pressuring him for marriage. He might be using you for a shield.