i am so sorry you are going thru this- it can be so confusing when you dont have any answers- and may not ever get any. its hard to reconcile the person you see before you now with the person you used to know/fell in love with. i am sorry he is treating you with such disrespect. i know that has got to be hard.
the best thing i know to do is to get some free divorce lawyer consultations and see what your rights are- try to take some of your control back. he clearly seems to be moving away from being in the marriage, at least from what you have written.
i dont know how they turn so quickly either. mine did- lots of others on here did too. this is a great place. you will find lots of support here. you arent alone and you are much stronger than you realize. ((hugs))

I am sending hugs your way, too. I'm sorry you have to go through this, esp during the holidays. I share your pain, and hope you can give even just a little self love to yourself even if it's drinking water or taking a bite of something.

Hammond,

I am so very sorry that you are going through this especially at this time of the year. It is the most devestating feeling in the world...I know, I am dealing with the same exact thing right now...and its the 2nd time that it has happened to me this year.

As hard as it may be, stop chasing him and trying to find him. You are doing more harm than good. You do not deserve to be treated in this manner, so don't give him any opportunity to treat you badly. Lean on your family and friends and this site for support. It helps to talk about it.

You need to take care of you right now. We all go through the no sleep, no eat stage and it seems like it lasts forever, but this is draining on your body and you have to eat healthy to keep your strength. He does not want to look at you and see a needy, desperate person. He needs to see the person he fell in love with way back when and only you can show him that.

If he walked out over an arguement and has not returned, it would be my guess, and again this is ONLY MY OPINION, that there is something more than meets the eye here.
(((((hugs)))))

What was the fight about? Seems too me that there is more too this than meets the eye it's so very hard when you cannot get answers you will be hurting and the fact you have posted here tells me you love your Husband more than you thought maybe?

We all say things in the heat of the moment it's Human nature but keep strong DS is a good place there are many many people here who understand how you feel ive been through this myself three years ago and now I am stronger wiser and happier takes time and strength too get this far look after yourself!

Your husband will come back give him space and time show him you love him and respect him hope you can get through this take care xx

This happens! I was bedridden and my ex walked out on me one day without any explanation! I still do not have one after almost 2 years an the divorce was final on Dec 10, this month! It is a long road and the one abandoned is usually the one most hurt. There is a site that deals with abandonment in a relationship and how hard it is for one to get over the divorce: it takes the one abandoned much longer (as much as 2-3 times longer than the one who did the abandonment. It can also be a sign of emotional abuse. Are there things in the relationship that you are not telling us or are too embarrassed to reveal? You need to open up and spill all of it now so that you can then move onto a position of greater strength as well as healing. This is a lesson. All things in life are there as part of the schoolhouse of life. We never get out of it as we always are learning. So, what is REALLY going on? No judgements will be made here: we are here to help each other. If you need to be "private," I promise that I will keep it that way should you want to mail me a message. Others here who know me know that I am a straight arrow and keep my mouth shut as requested. Take care and hugs,

I am so sorry this is happening to you. I know how devastating it can be.

I agree with the others--stop chasing him. You will likely never get any truthful answers and may actually find information you don't want to know (for example, is he involved with someone else?).

I am attaching a link that you may find very helpful. I think the suggestion to get an attorney is wise. The two best phone calls I made were to a competent attorney and a counselor. One got me what I needed financially and the other put me back together emotionally. Please make the calls.

Here is the link. Keep talking to us here. We understand.

http://dailystrength.org/c/Breakups_Divorce/forum/2816539-manual
This is a manual we members of DS compiled for new members just starting the breakup/divorce process. Lots of good advice, support, caring. Check it out so you can start healing.

I agree, you need to resist the urge to chase him because it will only push him further away. Sorry you are dealing with this at this time of year. Can you look into individual counseling? It will be most helpful for you while you wait to see what his next move is. Also if you do contact him I would simply just say, "I will make myself available when you are ready to talk." This is probably difficult for him too and he will most likely misinterpret anything said or not said. Use this time wisely to find out what you want out of your marriage too so when you do talk, you can both lay your cards out on the table. It will be helpful for him to know where you stand too. (((HUGS)))

I agree, as hard as it is you need to leave him alone. Maybe he needs a little time but looking for him will only push him further away. Stay busy and focus on your needs. I too am sorry you are going through this, holidays do make it worse but we are here to offer you our support. HUGS