Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I was on here last year. Well Jan 3, 2012, she filed. In Louisiana one must wait 365 days for it to be final. It's final now and I have slipped back into anger and depression. After all of the progress I had made, it has all come back. I have no motivation and am so mad or depressed. I gave and gave and this is what I get? I am so angry. She has major problems but I continued to support and love her over the years. Not to mention we have three children. She is narcissistic, really. I gave her a great life... home, cars, money... now she has become a princess and I am beneath her.
I must have been hiding a hope that it would not become final and we would get back together. I bought a new car last year and right after that she came to see me. I opened the door and was surprised to see her. She said, "I like your car." That was the first thing she had said to me in months. Maybe I was wrong but that set off something. I said thanks and slammed the door so hard the house shook. Maybe she didn't want anything at all but one would think she could at least start off with 'Hi, how have you been?' Did I mention that I am angry?
I must have been hiding a hope that it would not become final and we would get back together. I bought a new car last year and right after that she came to see me. I opened the door and was surprised to see her. She said, "I like your car." That was the first thing she had said to me in months. Maybe I was wrong but that set off something. I said thanks and slammed the door so hard the house shook. Maybe she didn't want anything at all but one would think she could at least start off with 'Hi, how have you been?' Did I mention that I am angry?
A long time ago, my boss was the top boss of the company and even though we worked closely every day and he depended so much on me, very rarely did he give me anything. He flew to New York on business and brought me back something inexpensive from Tiffany's and I loved it. I thanked him and said it took me by surprise as I wasn't expecting anything. And he responded "And you shouldn't." Wow, some way of saying "you're welcome."
You said your ex has become a princess, but recognize you had a part in that, although your heart was in a good place. Giving constantly also sets kids up without boundaries too, so know that if you do the same with your kids, they will expect material things like your ex and not see them as gifts of love but constantly expect them.
You are angry and your ex doesn't feel your anger or suffer from it. But YOU could with your health in many ways, with a stroke, heart attack, high blood pressure, and more.
How about going to the gym and start working off this anger and frustration and focusing on you. Anger isn't healthy and you want to move forward in a positive way to focus on you and not focus on your ex. Put your ex in the rear view mirror.
You stop the gifts to the ex and her princess days will dwindle down and reality will settle in.
If you can't stop the anger, then it's time for therapy because anger only hurts you. .
You will feel better with the passage of time.
after my breakup, i sold my two story house. being a single man without a woman and kids - i didn't need it anymore. my little apartment suits me well, is a lot cheaper, and is super easy to take care of.