Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I don't recall if I've put this on here before, everything from the time my wife left me for a younger kid 2 months ago just kind of blurs together. My wife and I had been together for 8 years, in that time she new how badly that I wanted a child of our own, granted I had a stepson who I had been raising since he was 3 and now 10 I very much love him don't get me wrong I just wanted someone of my own blood to carry me on in a sense into the future. It never happened, that dream was destroyed in an instant. When we had our last actual discussion a month ago she told me that she had been on birth control for over a year, what a way to crush someones heart for the desire of a child. I was completely and utterly destroyed, no man could have caused me any physical pain that would hurt more than when she told me that. Well it's been a month after that and I'm still wallowing in my pain and I find out through mutual friends that her little boyfriend is posting on his facebook that they will be having a baby, a bus could have struck me then and ended my life and I wouldn't have cared one bit. I don't know what to believe because we have mutual friends on the social site and she hasnt put anything about pregnancy but her little boyfriend is doing all the talking. It kills me to think that she knew how badly I wanted a child and now supposedly she's pregnant with this little punk's kid, and as far as I know they've been together a month. I feel like life is over, I feel like there's nothing else that can hurt me more than this news. She initially told me she wanted a separation and then surprised me with she has a boyfriend and we're still legally married, she see's nothing wrong with what she is doing, didn't even respect me enough for divorce to go thru before becoming a whore.
Couple of things you should use to get you through this time; 1) It's not the death of a dream to have your own child. You're what? 32? and male, so there's no real biological clock here. The dream of a child with her is gone, but that's it; 2) What a mistake it would have been to have a child with that woman. She doesn't tell you about being on birth control? Cheats on you, doesn't think its wrong? She does not deserve your love my friend.
When you are healed from this you'll find someone new, and she'll be decent, and honest and THAT will be the mother of your child.
think of your future. think of your health. this bad stuff has to be pushed away from you so that your spirit can lighten up and enjoy life again.
and, for God's sake, stay the hell off of Facebook. if you can't, then sell your computer.
I do understand how much it sucks tp put your effort into someone for years, and then come out empty-handed at the end. But, you're 32...it's not a death sentence by any means. Don't lose your integrity and character, which you apparently have, because this situation didn't turn out how you would like. Someone will be there,at some point, to truly value these wonderful qualities about yourself.
This is HER LOSS. What do you think she has gained over you? A child she conceived out of adultery and you think the gates of Walt Disney are going to open and they will live happily ever after? NO! What a mess she has. Be so very grateful you are away from that fraud of a human being. You have a chance to cleanse yourself of this trash. Go heal yourself. Your dream has not died. It is only redefined itself to be even BETTER than what it ever could have been with her. The only way you kill that dream now is by what you do to yourself. The dream lives on my friend. Go get it. Just use wiser eyes with your next partner. I wish you all the best.