I'm sorry for you family guy. I'm doing the same thing trying to convince myself I'm done. some days it works and I feel good, then she will txt me or call shes not abusive she almost acts likes shes concerned for me. when she is still sleeping with another man. what kinda crap is that. makes me too confused. If your wife verbally abusive focus on that , all the hurt she has brought to you . while she is doing whatever she wants. sounds like we are similar just my stbx knows how to manipulate me, for her advantage, now I look for it. these are not the people we married. I don't want to be with someone who dosnt love me. do you? as humans I think we are more afraid of the lonilness, emptiness, and the change. i'm trying to embrace the change to look forward to it, I'm still scared but trying to think positive. its a long road but we will get there.

Im sorry this is happening to you. I understand how badly it hurts to feel rejected. I know that at the end of the day you have to try to love yourself more. One day, someone will appreciate what a good person you are.

Mr broken i think u nailed it. Im her marionette and I know it, but don't know how-to stop. My love and protection insticnts are so strong theyre being turned against me. My emotions are being manipulated to a T. Everything is so turned around

Ibhad a vivid dream last night (thank you xanax) that there was heavy tree removal construction/destruction equipment outside our bedroom Window, one of the giant claw cranes that removes tree trunks started swinging towards our bedroom window and collides with our apartment, shattering the glass which rained down upon me and my children. My oldest and i got glass in our hands and feet and my youngest with autism got it in his eyes and his hands. I was trying to get the shards our of my hands while trying to keep my youngest from rubbing his eyes. Then i woke up because in real life my youngest got up and looked at his bed where my stbx had been sleeping the last couple of weeks, saw the bed was empty and ran to the living room couch, her secondary pad. He was looking for "mommy, mommy" and she was gone. My heart is broken for me, and broken for them. Shattered like glass. And i went from strong to weak in a couple of hours. I was doing so well. The stress from dealing with the psycho/druggie neighbor didnt help my mental state either. Frickin guy Dante came back again last night at 12:20 and rang our bell twice. I went down the the landing and he motioned for me to hurry and open then door. I gave him the index finger wait a minute gesture, turned around and dialed 911. I had gone to my local police station and tasked to the local Sargent about him.....15 hours prior. Cops arrives like 7-8 minutes later and he had already walked away by then. Im going to a sporting goods store and pricing out a handgun. Im a starry eyed liberal and this is why we have a 2nd amendemt. I don't want to hurt anyone. Im a lover, a grower, a creator of life but i dont feel safe in my own home. I'm grateful for the police but what if this guy comes back, and they dont get here in time? Again i dont ever want to hurt anyone. Im not out for vengance but i need to be able to defend myself