Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I am new to this site, so if I shouldn't have put this up please tell me.
I am just so completely crushed. It may seem silly because I was only dating this man for 6 months but I had known him since preschool. He moved back to the area after 2 failed marriages. First we just hung out, didn't really think of him as anything other than a friend. I enjoyed spending time with him. Then one day it was just like bam...I liked him. I wanted it to be more than just a friendship. He did too. We started dating...I fell for him hard and fast. I usually don't show how I feel but you could tell with him....I was different. You could tell I was in love. After 5 months I told him I was in love. He said he felt the same. Anyways, the night after our 6 month he was out drinking and cheated. She actually wrote me online the weekend after and told me what happened. He fessed up and seemed sorry. He wanted a second chance. I love him so I knew it would be hard but I decide to give him one. I broke down because of all the pain. Then the next day he decided he wasnt ready. Said he cared to much for me to hurt me. I couldn't believe he didnt even try. He then continues to confuse me with telling me he loves me and thinks he made the biggest mistake of his life but then the next day says he doesn't know why he doesn't want me! He ended up showing up at a bar he knew I was at.....with another woman. It broke my heart. I told him I thought we should cut all ties....he didnt want that. He still wanted to talk to me and said I needed to just let him figure his sh*t out, that he was confused. I couldn't do that. I told him he didnt need to string me along while he figures out whatever he needed to figure out. Now here I sit so crushed and sad. I had never thought he would of done that to me especially being friends before. He blames his past relationships but I have had crappy ones before too. I just don't get it. If ever even loved me why would he do that? Why would he think it would be ok for us to still chat like friends? Even hearing his name makes my heart drop into my stomach. I truly felt like he was who I was meant to be with. Who I would share my life with. I know they say time will heal my heart but I am not so sure. I will always love him. Hell, even now, I still want to be with him. I'm sorry for rambling. I'm just feeling so broken.
I am just so completely crushed. It may seem silly because I was only dating this man for 6 months but I had known him since preschool. He moved back to the area after 2 failed marriages. First we just hung out, didn't really think of him as anything other than a friend. I enjoyed spending time with him. Then one day it was just like bam...I liked him. I wanted it to be more than just a friendship. He did too. We started dating...I fell for him hard and fast. I usually don't show how I feel but you could tell with him....I was different. You could tell I was in love. After 5 months I told him I was in love. He said he felt the same. Anyways, the night after our 6 month he was out drinking and cheated. She actually wrote me online the weekend after and told me what happened. He fessed up and seemed sorry. He wanted a second chance. I love him so I knew it would be hard but I decide to give him one. I broke down because of all the pain. Then the next day he decided he wasnt ready. Said he cared to much for me to hurt me. I couldn't believe he didnt even try. He then continues to confuse me with telling me he loves me and thinks he made the biggest mistake of his life but then the next day says he doesn't know why he doesn't want me! He ended up showing up at a bar he knew I was at.....with another woman. It broke my heart. I told him I thought we should cut all ties....he didnt want that. He still wanted to talk to me and said I needed to just let him figure his sh*t out, that he was confused. I couldn't do that. I told him he didnt need to string me along while he figures out whatever he needed to figure out. Now here I sit so crushed and sad. I had never thought he would of done that to me especially being friends before. He blames his past relationships but I have had crappy ones before too. I just don't get it. If ever even loved me why would he do that? Why would he think it would be ok for us to still chat like friends? Even hearing his name makes my heart drop into my stomach. I truly felt like he was who I was meant to be with. Who I would share my life with. I know they say time will heal my heart but I am not so sure. I will always love him. Hell, even now, I still want to be with him. I'm sorry for rambling. I'm just feeling so broken.
He is clearly confused and you seem to know what you want. Good for you for staying strong and standing up for what you want. In my opinion the best thing you can do is take time apart and go NC. I'm sure you both have things you need to think through and work out, but focus on yourself. It is very hard to go NC but is a part of the healing. Focus on yourself and take care of yourself. Someone here once told me talk to yourself the way you would speak to a friend and be kind to yourself, which helps.
My ex flaunted his new girlfriend in my face and went as far to show up at MY families place uninvited and invite himself and her for dinner there a week after we broke up. We deserve people that want to be with us and know what they want, and that will treat us with respect. Stay strong and don't forget to stand up for what you want.
I am wishing you happiness and healing. Please take care of yourself and focus on you. Happiness needs to come from within before we can truly be happy in a relationship. I am definitely not as knowledgeable, well spoken, or qualified as other people here, but I find knowing that other people are out there, are reading my story, and taking time to reply is comforting. The fact you are here and are reaching out for support is a show of great strength.
All the best to you and your healing!
You may have heard all the canned lines of support, but we will all make it. We just may have to lean on each other a little to get there.