Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

13,009 Members

100,360 Posts

0 Online

WhatHappened88 08/17/2015

I went to pay our credit card bill and saw a charge by my husband - we're divorcing - that upset me. He went to this place that's a concert venue/bar/restaurant in the mountains near where he lives which is the town where we went to college. It's a popular place for college kids to go and he always wanted to go there when we were in college a billion years ago. It was just a reminder that he's moved on. He cheated a few years ago and we tried to make it work but he left me. He moved out in November and said it was a "trial separation" but he made no effort to fix our marriage. I'm struggling to move on. I'm so alone and I miss him so much and seeing him at these places that were special in college really upsets me. I'm not sitting here doing nothing. i had friends over on Friday and go out more now than I have since high school. It just hurts. I just had to get it out because I have no one else to vent to and I just need to share with people who understand my pain. I don't know who he went with. he could be on a date or with friends. The thought of him with someone else (even though he cheated) kills me. I am so angry he turned into this asshole I don't even know and I need to stop holding on to the guy he used to be. This situation just sucks in so many ways. Thanks for reading.

kbbcoop77 08/17/2015

Those triggers really suck, sorry you're going through this. I saw pictures of my ex wife at the same damn resort we went to every summer with the kids, only now she goes with her cheater partner. That hurt bad. It'll get easier over time.

broken234 08/17/2015

I know exactly what you are talking about. Seeing the bank statement and knowing that he has taken OW to places we once went together is hard. I go out with friends and family too. I try to keep busy, but I know that sometimes you just wish things would have turned out differently. I wish that my stbx was different. That he wouldn't have made the choices he made. But I guess none of that is in my control. I struggle to move on sometimes too, but I am getting there. You will too. Because you deserve better than to be cheated on. Let whoever his next victim is worry about it now. Leopards don't change their spots. Take this as a sign that he is not happy and is trying to live in his past.

lostntx 08/17/2015

I know exactly how you feel. I saw a charge just like that by my stbx. We were still talking some at that point so I questioned her about it. She said the charge was just for her. Well guess what, you can request a copy of the receipt. I did and saw her name and another man's name on the receipt. That was very painful. But it was the proof I needed to know that she was not the person I married. She has turned into a liar and cheater. I am angry too. Just want to let you know you aren't alone. You might also want to cancel all joint charge accounts and set up new ones just for you.

Robert1001 08/17/2015

I read your article and it reminds me of our situtation. I am also trying to hold onto someone the way they used to be. She also cheated on me but I forgave her because down deep I really love her. She has a new group of friends and is hanging out the way she did when she was much younger except with an older crowd. I am slowly excepting the notion that people change. I am very old fashion and deep rooted in tradition and faith. Although she has moved on....sort to speak, I will continue to always love her. She has separated from me. I didn't separate from her. And it doen't bother me, at this time in my life, to have faith that she will someday see that she has a husband and family that loves her and will be always be here when and if she decides to come back to us.

JoeMc3 08/17/2015

My STBX wife and I have just started the divorce process. She has asked that we stay in the house together until she can get her career moving, the kids can settle, and the house is more ready to be sold. Meanwhile, she wants to continue with other relationships.

My wife doesn't work. I have a full time job and several side jobs. I asked her how I should feel when I see a charge on my credit card for some dinner that she had with some other guy. How should I feel that my hard earned coin is paying for his steak dinner and who knows what else?

Join the Conversation