Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
I completely sympathize with you. Although mine was not out of the blue. We have been struggling for a few years with a mini separation over the summer. She said she needed space. I did find some emails between her and another guy. She claims nothing happened. Something was going on, Im just not sure how far it went.
In September she had a change of heart and decided to try to make us work. For a few weeks there really was a change. Then 6 weeks ago she stopped reiterating I Love You when I told her that. When I asked her about it, she said she doesnt know how she feels about me. She said she loves me but not like a wife should love a husband. I have backed off to give her time. Its very confusing, we do many things together, just not things by ourselves. Its with the kids or short trips to the store together.
Its 6 weeks since she told me she loves me. Even before that, she said she was just saying it to appease me. 6 weeks ago changed my life. Ive been a wreak. I miss her love we had. The problem is I still love her and want to make things work. I want to work at us and go to counseling. She says she cant handle that right now. I told her I will not push anything with us right now. I just want to get though the of the year, but come the new year we must begin to deal with us. I cant keep going on like this. The pain at times is overwhelming.
In September she had a change of heart and decided to try to make us work. For a few weeks there really was a change. Then 6 weeks ago she stopped reiterating I Love You when I told her that. When I asked her about it, she said she doesnt know how she feels about me. She said she loves me but not like a wife should love a husband. I have backed off to give her time. Its very confusing, we do many things together, just not things by ourselves. Its with the kids or short trips to the store together.
Its 6 weeks since she told me she loves me. Even before that, she said she was just saying it to appease me. 6 weeks ago changed my life. Ive been a wreak. I miss her love we had. The problem is I still love her and want to make things work. I want to work at us and go to counseling. She says she cant handle that right now. I told her I will not push anything with us right now. I just want to get though the of the year, but come the new year we must begin to deal with us. I cant keep going on like this. The pain at times is overwhelming.
KIM
I think you are wise to back off and give her some time and space, but be attentive without forcing the issue. I would be careful about hunting for incriminating emails and the like - such tactics can break trust and cause her to turn away more, even though you are worried about how much you trust her. Good luck.
Never let the kids feel the tension between you and your wife. My stbx and I are pleasant and polite at all times around the kids and they are doing excellent with all the changes that have come because of it.
If you split let the kids have opportunities to talk with you with quality time, my kids open up to me in the car sometimes out of the blue and it is a gift.
Hugs, hugs, hugs hang in there and find comfort in the smiles of your children. They are the gifts of your marriage.