You will survive. And become a stronger and more beautiful person than you already are. You will hurt, you will cry, you will smile. You will get through it.

your doing the right thing. Go to your attorney and bring any evidence you have with you. If you feel like you could use some counseling do that too. I did in the beginning and it helped. good luck to you!

Suggest you keep this to yourself for now.

You will get a lot of advice from those you tell. They will mean well but they have not gone through this. Their advice may influence you in ways you will later regret. Try keeping it with folks here on DS and maybe a counselor, lawyer and maybe DivorceCare group with people who might have been through it and can be helpful to you.

Secondly, I only got an attorney after my X did because she told me she got one. Your attorney may help you avoid court costs so don't provoke the legal battle option unless you really intend to go forward with it. Generally DivorceCare teaches that when you go the legal route you divide your assets 4 ways, you and the X and each of your attorney's. Try to minimize the part that goes to the attorneys and do the split in a civil manner. Otherwise, you can spend over 10,000 like I did and my X spent more than twice that. So we lost over 30,000 to attorneys and could have been 15,000 for each of us.

Divorce is breaking up a business. So keep the emotion out of it as best you can. This is no time for revenge or hate or any of that stuff as it will drive up your legal fees. Unfortunately, more than 85% of our energy is consumed by emotion when we go through this and that keeps family attorneys in business.

Good luck and Godspeed.

Withdraw some money from the joint account and open an account at another bank in only your name.

Ask your atty how long it takes to respond to you phone calls and/or emails and if it is more than 48 hrs, run like hell.

Make copies of EVERY official document and put the originals in a safe deposit box.

Start a journal where you log every conversation with your spouse and your attorney.

I agree about keeping to yourself until he is served if you can. But prepare, anyway, to leave quickly if you need to. Divide any prescription meds you take and keep some in your car and some with a friend or relative, and pack a bag. be ready to walk out of the house with only the clothes on your back.

One last thing, keep your cell phone in your pocket or on your nightstand. Don't get caught having to go out one door with you phone on the other side of the house.

Hopefully, you will never need to worry about any of this stuff, and if you don't, it is great. But if you prepare and you need it, you will be forever grateful. Trust me...I had some money put aside and I had a place to go. It was almost a year between the time I made the preparations and the time I needed to use them, but I am totally glad.

Good Luck.