Its human nature to want wht we cant have.
Identify the underlying issue and realize this person might not be worthy of you.
Use ur energy to focus on you. Be selfish.. worry abt numbrr one.. love who u r and know wht u have to offer for the right person.
Good luck...

Thank u...MAN, it just sounds so easy on paper...I think the underlying issue is that I still love him ::sigh:: so how do I STOP CARING, STOP WORRYING, STOP LOVING HIM?

WHEN I GET OVER THIS (Because I WILL!) How Can I Love Again? How Do I Trust Again. SCARY To think that far ahead :(

All I Want Is For Him To Love Me Again And For Us To START Over...LOL! :/ PATHETIC I KNOW!

In the same boat - and I think part of it is because I loved him beyond the superficial exterior - I loved the man inside - not just his good looks or his actions but his heart. That is what hurts so bad - but I have to realize he changed and the man that I married is gone. :(

If it's pathetic then I was/am too ..... I am still feeling the same and she hast hurt me so much in past month or so with the things she has said to me. I am slowly starting to see that there can be a life, that I could move on.... Just take the advice of taking care of you , be a little selfish, think about what you want with no consideration for the other person. I mean after all, isn't that what they did? It may just turn out that it isn't something we did, it may be them..
Keep your head high when you feel like dying, don't give them the satisfaction of seeing you low....

Peace

I'm sorry Msdee84, I'm in the same boat. I'm in love with someone that no longer loves me. It's torturous. I miss her like crazy, and everyday I have the same episodes where my heart just drops into my stomach when I sit and think about us not spending our lives together. I wish I had a huge reset button on the past year and a half. I would hit it in a heartbeat. I have alot of regret, and looking back there were alot of things I wish I could have done differently. I'm constantly wondering and kicking myself for being stubborn or angry.

Keep your head up, people love you. It's not pathetic to still love that person. I agree with the other replies. Concentrate on you. Take care of yourself, do something you've always wanted to do.

I'm sorry you are going through this. Give yourself time to grieve. It is a very real loss, and it takes time to heal. Just because another person doesn't want to be with us anymore, doesn't mean we can just turn off our feelings for them. Even though it can seem like the pain and longing will never end (believe me,I know!), it does start to get better with time. In the meantime, keep reaching out to family and friends (even though I know what you mean that it can feel like a "masquerade" at times when being around others)--and keep getting support here on DS. Take care.

I totally get the masquerade part of the equation. It's like I'm faking interest in things and people I really, truly cared about before. It's hard to hold conversations sometimes.

I too totally understand what you are going through. The answer is in finding yourself again, what makes you happy, maybe you quit doing because you were together. You definitely need friends and family even if there is just one that you feels comfortable to be who you are now. Free to cry, question, and be encouraged. And of course the many here who have or are experiencing the same thing. We are here for you.

It would be nigh on impossible to make the pain go away. All you can really do is hang in there. What you can do is still be there when the storm passes. These things must be endured.
Be weak when you need to be. Cry. Be strong enough to say to someone you trust "I'm not okay". Do the things you used to enjoy. Try to find new things to enjoy. Take a moment for what it's worth because the odds are that right now you'll only be able to allow yourself a moment of happiness at a time, maybe the right person will ask you to do the right activity and you'll forget about hurting for two or three hours. The pain will go away when it's ready. What you have to do is marinate in it and not run from it. Deal with it. Face it head on and acknowlege it's power and just keep moving forward. Eventually it will leave you.
It's been nearly two years since my wife left me. I survived. Then I fell in love with another woman who apparently doesn't care about me at all at this point. It hurts like hell.

I feel the exact same way! I know people think I'm crazy.I don't see how we can love someone for so long,then sign a few papers and stop feeling anything for that person.And I ask myself the same question...why doesn't he love me anymore?MISSMYFAMILY said it perfectly.And I'm learning about myself,and how to be without him,etc..I get the logic. But emotions can't be turned off so easily.Well,maybe they can...his did.I wish I could make you feel better.Looks like time is the only "cure".

praying for you all because i know how it feels and im fighting it all within myself as well.

I am going through a similar situation as you, though I understand not one person can truly know how you feel because every relationship is different. For the first time in my life I am completely lost and the only thing that keeps me going is my wonderful three year old son. I can only. advise you to find things to do to keep your self busy. try counseling it helps. Just know you're not alone and there are people just like you and I out there to listen.

Thank You !!! Every single message was uplifting; I appreciate you all.