I am on the verge of breaking down , he threw in my face today that the people that he is seeing has their own cars and their own places not that that bothers me because I have my own too he doesn't  but I'm so angry at how fast he can move on and how nonchalant he is that it breaks down my being me and takes away the happiness that I thought I had found he doesn't care at all that he slept with someone and he has only been gone for 4 weeks and I can't understand how he could just not care and then he asked to get back with me last week and turns around today and says that he never let go any of his friends for me I just hate him and I hate feeling that way because he is my son's father I feel like I'm going down a bad path of animosity that I can't control I love you guys on here because you always give me insight to see the truth for what it is and I see it but today I'm struggling really bad too except he doesn't love me.

I'm so angry at myself for  being with him all of these years and he left me twice and slept with someone right away I am really torn and broken inside then I want to believe and I hate that. I hate that I feel I will never find anyone and he will always have someone because he is so good looking but he's ugly inside.  I'm just hurting right now and I'm angry. I don't think my personal  life has any good to offer me other than my son and he is all that I need but everyone wants to be fully happy in all areas of their life I just don't feel like I'm one of those people and I don't know why I'm hurting