Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Hi everyone,
Wow, de ja vu for me here. I joined here just over a year ago when my boyfriend devestated me with the news that he was leaving me, out of the blue decided that he didnt feel the same for me anymore (well, it was out of the blue for me to hear it!)
Cut to two months after, we got back together to give it another go. However, it emerged that he had had a fling with a work colleague that ended when we reconciled. Things were sour between them so they no longer spoke in work (much to my relief!)
Things were strained between us then but I forgave him and put my all into making our relationship work, but it was never really reciprocated. A few weeks ago, he called and told me that they began speaking again in work and now he has these feelings for her he cannot explain and doesnt know what he wants. I told him we were over. 5 years we've been together and he throws it away over a fling in work. I feel like I wasted an entire year of my life and ended up back where I started with him...
Thing is, my family and friends are very supportive... but now that the initial shock of this has waned, its as though they no longer feel the need to ask how im coping. And to be honest, I feel like Im burdening them by talking to them about how I feel. Truth is, more than anything I miss the companionship, having that one person there to share everything with. Your best friend.
Does anyone else feel this way? If theres anyone who could share some words of support, or if anyone wants to compare notes on bad break ups please mail me and we can rant together, and spare those who really cannot understand unless they have been through it.
Thanks guys xxx
Wow, de ja vu for me here. I joined here just over a year ago when my boyfriend devestated me with the news that he was leaving me, out of the blue decided that he didnt feel the same for me anymore (well, it was out of the blue for me to hear it!)
Cut to two months after, we got back together to give it another go. However, it emerged that he had had a fling with a work colleague that ended when we reconciled. Things were sour between them so they no longer spoke in work (much to my relief!)
Things were strained between us then but I forgave him and put my all into making our relationship work, but it was never really reciprocated. A few weeks ago, he called and told me that they began speaking again in work and now he has these feelings for her he cannot explain and doesnt know what he wants. I told him we were over. 5 years we've been together and he throws it away over a fling in work. I feel like I wasted an entire year of my life and ended up back where I started with him...
Thing is, my family and friends are very supportive... but now that the initial shock of this has waned, its as though they no longer feel the need to ask how im coping. And to be honest, I feel like Im burdening them by talking to them about how I feel. Truth is, more than anything I miss the companionship, having that one person there to share everything with. Your best friend.
Does anyone else feel this way? If theres anyone who could share some words of support, or if anyone wants to compare notes on bad break ups please mail me and we can rant together, and spare those who really cannot understand unless they have been through it.
Thanks guys xxx
If you need to vent or talk to anyone let me know. I also need someone and my family is all of the same mindset that my ex is shit and I need to suck it up and be a man. I understand why they feel this way because I would be telling my brother the same thing if it was him going through this. But being the one IN the hole it's a different point of view.
I'll send you a private message in a minute. And befriend you.
I remember feeling those exact things at the end of a relationship, its tough to go from someone you shared a good part of your day and life with to not communicating at all. yeh, its real tough and is a normal reaction to missing it. But that doesn't mean you need to contact him. :) You may slip here or there, but try to keep in the back of your mind the reason you let him go in the first place.
Welcome to the group
My husband cheated and left for that relationship. He never said anything was wrong no sign affectionate up until he left.. he just lobbed a hangrinaide into our lives and left.
I think you are doing the right thing.. its all we can do is move on for ourselves. You have already tried a second time.. how long did you try? Our try once I found our lasted three weeks... very hard..
We will get through this.. let me know anytime you need to talk.
I know it is tough to not feel like the time you spent with him is 'wasted' time. I have almost twenty years collectively between two broken marriages. Yea...I like to marry cheaters but I am hoping to change that. I try to look at it as a learning experience. I may be a little slower than others but I am learning :)
I think you have some good advice started here. Counseling/therapy is an excellent place to start. It has helped me and many of us here.
This is a great place for support so use this great resource and make a few friends.
Welcome to the group, good luck and (((((hugs)))))
pollofrito i thank god i wasnt married to him, but it has put the fear in me now and im afraid of trusting anyone again.
bluesky we were together nearly a year... he managed to ruin yet another birthday for me. Maybe he just breaks my heart so he doesnt have to buy me a gift.. haha. Its the quiet time that hurts the most. Like when you remember something sincere he said and something you cherished, and then you realise it was all bull.
Everyone here seems like genuine people... where did we all go wrong??
You have us!!! This is a great community where somebody always walking in your shoes and understand what you are going thru.
My ex boyfriend was indecisive as well. He didn't left me for a fling , she is his baby mama.
He describe her to me as the most horrible person who treat him like crap, make him feel less than a man, spit on him on occasion , trow him out in the middle of the night when she knows he had no transportation, called the cops on him ..... ECT
The first time he broke up with me to go back to her , I agreed since he said he wanted to fix the relationship because of the kids.
Like you he came back to me and I took him back.
Like you I tried to do everything to make it work.
And like you he came back and said he was confused and left me hanging.
I think what hurt in our situation is the fact that we gave a second chance, we gave it everything we could and still got toss in the trash like we didn't matter :(