So sorry. Could you tell us a little more of whats been happening?

I'm in the same place. She will ask me to do things with her. Hugs and kisses me then I don't hear from her for weeks. We've been separated for 7 months I'm completely mentally and physically exausted. Sorry you are going through this, I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Good luck and take care

I had divorce rage and going to divorce care helped
me a lot with that problem.

My rage was cured eventually thru forgiveness. I could
Finally move thru it. Its a very scary emotion to feel and
hold on to. Is there Infidelity issues? Abuse issues?
Addiction issues?

She Sounds pretty dysfunctional and crazymaking
if she is purposely trying to mess with your head and
you two are separated. Mine did that before separation
And the divorce and he had a GF all lined up waiting.

Therapy helped me a lot plus i went to alanon. i did
whatever i could do to move thru the muck to get thru
It all to get the other side, grief is a big part of this whole
process too, HUGS

Sending you a hug Hugabus, it will get better as
You can detach from her. Stay no contact as much
as possible for your own sanity and wellbeing.

There are kids involved in this mess. So not seeing her is hard.

Brokennz, that sounds exactly like what my ex is doing to me as well. I have my kids every day after school and every other weekend so I have to see her all the time. Every time I see her she's trying to play some game to mess with me. Most of those involve the new live in boyfriend she waited no time at all to get.

I finally had to start sending her a text with the information she needed to know about the kids right before I left to drop them off. Then when drop off happens I give the kids a kiss, tell them I love them and leave. She doesn't get a single word from me.

Doing it where I had to talk to her in person brought up the shattered feelings and withdrawals anew every day.

I'm so sorry you are having to go through this. Be the man and be there for your kids. Don't talk bad about her in front of them (no matter what) and keep her as far out of your life as you can.

Talk about your feelings rather than bottling them up. Start doing things to make you feel better. Go and find a therapist and/or support group to start working through your stuff.

You're not alone in this. Just take it 1 day at a time right now.

It has been difficult for me, I am lucky we do not have children, we shared 2 dogs whom he also abandon. When he would want to come over after he moved out, he would use the excuse he wants to see them, and how dare I keep him from his dogs. So I would let him come, and it was always the same thing, play with them for a few minutes then want to talk to me, and be with me. I am his security. Took Me 6 months to admit that...but that is exactly what it is. He wants to know that if what he has going on now doesn't pan out he has the security blanket to fall back on, I am sure that is the same deal you are in! UGGHHH So, even though I love this man, and would work it out, I am hell bent on cutting the cord and showing him what life is truly like alone and cutting him out and off. No more games, no more constant hurt when he walks back out that door. :) Hope things are better for you now!

No abuse . No violence
No drug or alc issues.

I cherished her i did everytjing and more
All of her friends i was an amazing husband.

But that meant nothing she say there are no feelings for me anymore. She questions if she ever had feelings for me.

There is no other person.

I dont understand 140 percent commited to her and after 11 years of marraige . She throws me away like rubbish.

I feel worthless

You aren't worthless! She's the one who made the mistake in not appreciating what a good man she had. You can just bet her new dude will get the same treatment. You haven't changed you're still as good a man as ever. Your next lady will appreciate you very much. Your ex was a mistake. Take care!

I fear there will be no one else. I feel that i wont be able to trust again.
Not sure i can loce again either.... hopfully this will pass in time.

I hope you are in therapy and divorce care.

They both do help a lot. You sound pretty Dark.
This is a long hard road and journey. We need
Lots of love, help and support along the way
so please keep reaching out.

Some times you find out more after the Divorce
Is over. I knew all i needed to know pre Divorce
what he was up to and It had been bad for the
Last 12 years.

He Wanted out and found someone he wanted
to be with, he is still with her, not Much i could do.

Let yourself grieve your losses and feel Your feelings
and emotions as uncomfortable as they are. They
need to be felt, moved thru, faced and hopefully
let go of, HUGS

"i fear there will be no one else. I feel that i wont be able to trust again.
Not sure i can loce again either.... hopfully this will pass in time"

I think most if us have the same exact fears.