Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Its awful to see how much pain so many are going through here. Does it go away? --this pain?
Why is it that each day, i have to replay things in my head about the awful past (even when its been almost 6 years now?!) and worry about the future ? When will this stupid cloud of gloom lift off ?
Is it that i have got used to this feeling of doom? --am i actually feeling scared to move on and be happy?
Is this victimspeak..yep. Is this self-sabotage? Perhaps. Whatever it is--if i were to describe it, its a sickening, stupid (cos its high time i stopped being miserable), gloomy , dull achy feeling that i seem to constantly have.
I know i have things to be grateful for; i know this is not the end of the world and then there is that part of me which keeps me down by repeating again and again : "hey you got dumped; how & why did he---do you remember how they acted in front of you; what he said; what she said,..." : I mostly almost shout out a 'shut up' to these thoughts that want to drag me down ; i remember things i should be grateful about (this helps sometimes--not always); i pray (nowadays not for specifics--but for 'strength, wisdom and courage' ); i read my daughter's books--children's books are so entertaining is something i found out ['Diary of a Wimpy Kid' was really enjoyable].
I know all about 'letting go of the past' and overall,while i am trying to move on('trying' now seems lame--sounding more of an 'excuse' to stay in this place of darkness-in my case, that is)--taking a day at a time, as i have decided to, that cloud of gloom seems to still follow me wherever i go.
Why is it that each day, i have to replay things in my head about the awful past (even when its been almost 6 years now?!) and worry about the future ? When will this stupid cloud of gloom lift off ?
Is it that i have got used to this feeling of doom? --am i actually feeling scared to move on and be happy?
Is this victimspeak..yep. Is this self-sabotage? Perhaps. Whatever it is--if i were to describe it, its a sickening, stupid (cos its high time i stopped being miserable), gloomy , dull achy feeling that i seem to constantly have.
I know i have things to be grateful for; i know this is not the end of the world and then there is that part of me which keeps me down by repeating again and again : "hey you got dumped; how & why did he---do you remember how they acted in front of you; what he said; what she said,..." : I mostly almost shout out a 'shut up' to these thoughts that want to drag me down ; i remember things i should be grateful about (this helps sometimes--not always); i pray (nowadays not for specifics--but for 'strength, wisdom and courage' ); i read my daughter's books--children's books are so entertaining is something i found out ['Diary of a Wimpy Kid' was really enjoyable].
I know all about 'letting go of the past' and overall,while i am trying to move on('trying' now seems lame--sounding more of an 'excuse' to stay in this place of darkness-in my case, that is)--taking a day at a time, as i have decided to, that cloud of gloom seems to still follow me wherever i go.
I found this to be true. I figured that just waiting long enough would heal all wounds, but found that love is truly the trick. Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Embrace YOU. The only person you hurt by holding on to the old feelings is yourself. Once you can escape the fear of letting go and actually do it, you will set yourself free. Then you can love again. Start with yourself and then you can allow others to love you.
I am learning to really respect myself at last and to do things I want to do. For far too long I allowed someone else to control my life whether it was my children or my ex.
Well now I am finally taking my life back, and it feels really good!!
I am living my own life and moving on. Loving me for me, and accepting who I am and working on the aspects that I know need work on to become that nicer better eperson that I know I am capable of being.
I want to enjoy and embrace what is rest of my life, and I want it to be good, so I am making sure that it is going to happen.
I am grateful that I have my faith in God to help me achieve this and make it a reality.
I hope and pray you can do this for yourself too.
http://www.get.gg/cbtstep1.htm