Breakups & Divorce Support Group
Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.
Tomorrow, I am going before a judge to basically bash the stbx. No, Im not doing it on purpose to hurt him, Im doing it to tell the truth. I will not and cannot lie. I just wont do it. What he has gotten himself into is his fault and his problem, not mine any more.
We go for what they call a settlement conference. My lawyer advised me I have to tell the judge my side of the story. I am not to picture him as a poor man, that will get me no where. What my lawyer is saying is this:
He makes money. He has to. His Mortgage is $1950 a month, and to rent the shop he works in is $750 a month. He takes the kids to dinner most times they are with him. He has a new garden, with new garden equiptment, (benches to hold tools and what not), and on and on. He already is in "trouble" with the courts, he hasnt signed the discovery, or the child support agreement, or even has not given his financials like he is supposed to. Not my fault.
I do feel bad, but I cant let myself feel that way any more. The choices he made in his and our life were not mine. He did them. Now, finally, he might be paying for his bad choices.
Of course, it will all be my fault. If I hadnt left him and filed for divorce, he wouldnt be in this mess. Truth is, he WOULD be in this mess at some point and time in his life, and if I were still with him, I would be in it too.
Think of me. Send me good thoughts. Hugs, prayers, anything. Please. Thank you all my DS family. I know I can count on you.
We go for what they call a settlement conference. My lawyer advised me I have to tell the judge my side of the story. I am not to picture him as a poor man, that will get me no where. What my lawyer is saying is this:
He makes money. He has to. His Mortgage is $1950 a month, and to rent the shop he works in is $750 a month. He takes the kids to dinner most times they are with him. He has a new garden, with new garden equiptment, (benches to hold tools and what not), and on and on. He already is in "trouble" with the courts, he hasnt signed the discovery, or the child support agreement, or even has not given his financials like he is supposed to. Not my fault.
I do feel bad, but I cant let myself feel that way any more. The choices he made in his and our life were not mine. He did them. Now, finally, he might be paying for his bad choices.
Of course, it will all be my fault. If I hadnt left him and filed for divorce, he wouldnt be in this mess. Truth is, he WOULD be in this mess at some point and time in his life, and if I were still with him, I would be in it too.
Think of me. Send me good thoughts. Hugs, prayers, anything. Please. Thank you all my DS family. I know I can count on you.
*big hug*
whispering let me know how it goes cause mine is aug 12th..
what time of day is it, so i can be here sitting and waiting to tell about it
Revealing your finances for a guy is probably a little like going to the Gynocologist for a woman. Sorry for the feaky analogy, but that's how I feel today. If he is not following the rules, the judge will not like that.
Tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. It will indeed set you free. Go sister, hold you head up high and be strong. Court sucks. Hugs to you...
Our stories are exactly alike.Just had to call my lawyer this morning to tell him about a lie my stbx created in our last court date to bully me.We are using it against him to show how he bullies me. I know you are strong and gonna do great.You have nothing to worry about....he(your stbx)should be shaking in his shoes!!!!!
Will let you all know tomorrow how it went:)
Send up prayers and sending out good thoughts. You are going to be fine. (((HUGS)))
Stay strong, tell your side of the story, and don't worry about him. Don't feel bad--you need to look out for yourself.
Sending a hug and good luck wishes. Let us know how it went.
Keep that in mind, that you're objectives are to state FACTS not biased opinions, nor emotional interludes of what's brought you there. As well, I am certain your atty. has prepped you for this meeting and what will take place. In there, best example I can use is, haggling over the price of a new car with a car salesperson. Staying unemotional gets you the best deal. If the salesperson can get the instinct that you're hooked on that ride, he/she is going to get you at full price...