Yep I just posted another response here short time ago it's definitely been one of those days..can't explain why. There are good days, even great days..then there are days like today when i don't want to leave the bedroom. Sick of this nonsense.

I sure would like to not be affected by him anymore.It would truly suck if this doesn't ever go away.

Agreed

It's part of the process. Thanks, forgot how true that is.

I am right with you all this morning. My stbx emailed me about money I owed him for a utility bill and I said I will just put that into your bank account. Then he said I have some music cd's to give you can I come by and put them in the mailbox in the middle of the night and I said no, it might wake me and the dog up and I don't need that at 3 am or whatever hour you drag home.

He and I have been apart for 9 months and I keep saying to him ok what we doing legally? How do you want to handle it? No response. I said whatever we do I just want to feel respected, which is not something I have felt in a while. I unfriended him on facebook but admit to stalking it and there is where I feel some of the disrespect, but mostly it is his personal disrespect. I am beginning to really hate him and maybe that is what I need to do.
That's a hard thing for me. That is not the kind of person I am.

Yep there are days I don't want to get up or out or leave the bedroom. Time to quit letting that man and what he does have so much control. I am just sad to see this marriage fall apart. Really sad.

I feel like everyone here. While it is a process, I am too ready for it to be over. It's exhausting living this way. You feel powerful and exhilarated for a stretch of time and then bam, you are back to feeling the pain of the demise of your marriage/relationship. I left the house to visit a neighbor for an hour and she could tell that I was feeling down again. I want control of my life back, not this. Once again, it is exhausting living this way.

Exhausting is a great word. Feel better today but yesterday was a wasted day, just couldn't get moving. Why we give people who don't want to be with us so much power is sad and frustrating. Just have to count the blessings we have and keep moving forward. Getting stuck like yesterday was a damn shame and a waste.

Exhausting is the perfect word to describe it. I feel like I'm running on empty. I think it's the lack of hope. Sometimes I feel like I'll never be happy again. After all, if the person who swore to love you for life can abandon you, why would someone else want you? Obviously that's fatalistic but the constant worry and attempts to stop the negative self talk leave me emotionally spent. I know. It's all part of the process.

Just my thought for the night: He's upset because I told him some uncomfortable truths: namely, he throws away those who love him and then has to join a dating service to keep from being alone. My tears are too good for him. I shed them because I am a person who gives a darn, while his next relationship will end the same way because what has he learned? Nothing. It's tough, and I don't kid myself for a second that our tough days are over, but we will get there, and in the end, living well is the best revenge. Best wishes to all as we enter a new week.

Yes it's hard at times getting out of bed. Great days then some horribly bad days. Then I feel guilty for moping around on those "bad days." I guess I have kinda justified it though. Worry, frustration, anger, etc...all of these feelings over a period of time take a toll on my mind and body. I need the mental rest. My mind and body need a lazy day once in awhile to digest everything. Then I wake up the next day, look back, and know that's my drive to move forward. This IS part of the healing process and these days will become less frequent as they have done for me. It just takes time.

i so so so agree. i honestly wish, almost every day, that he'd move back to where his parents and younger brother live. several states away. so i wouldn't have to worry about running into him. so he wouldn't be mixing with our mutual friends. he doesnt hardly ever see his son anyway, even though that's his reason for staying here. he literally saw J for 2 hours in the past 38 days. by HIS choice. ugh. i would so like it if every "good" or "ok" day i have wasn't immediately followed by a bad day, gut wrenching pain, etc. i know we all feel it. i hope better for us all very soon.

Hi all, I am new here. I feel all the things you are feeling. I hate that we have to live in the same house for a year (separate bedrooms) until we work all the finances out, save money to move, etc. I hate that he sends me conflicting messages - for example - I don't know if this can be worked out or not. When I question him, he says no way in hell this can be worked out at this time. There goes another conflicting message. Then when I go out with friends, he says where are you going. I say out with friends ~ which is true.. This weekend he says do you think that when you say your going out with friends, you are going to make me so jealous that I will come running back to you? He has always been very jealous. I just don't know what to think. I just don't get him. I just know that I need to keep busy or I am sad and sit an cry and I will be darned if I will let him see my tears anymore.

jak111, I dont know how you do it, living together..UGH. My ex and I tried that for 3 weeks, after the third weekend when she left on Friday and came back drunk on Sunday with a big HI to my daughter and I who were watching a movie, I told her Monday morning to pack her clothes and go stay with her mother who lives about 2-3 miles away, and we would deal with the other stuff later. She wanted to leave, she was totally 100% crystal clear on that, but wanted to stay and figure out to where while I still paid ALL the household bills. No way was I doing that. Praying for you, you will get through it.