You have your sons.

You aren't really alone. ;o)

There was a time before him, that I am sure you enjoyed, yes?

I know the feeling. You are not alone- you do have your sons that will always be a part of your life. You have us here at DS to support you. I am also not looking to start everything from scratch, believe me. I am an old fashioned guy who thought it was like this:
1) you marry a good woman
2) both stay true to each other
3) raise kids
4) grow old together and support one another.
SURPRISE SURPRISE.....!

You're not. You have us so there!

((((((((llmt))))))))

You summed it up well.

Naming the fear of being alone for what it is, seems like the first step. Maybe you don't mean fear of being totally alone (those kiddos are always there!!)....but being without a significant other? That is valid after a long marriage. I felt that way at first and sometimes still do.

We are all here for you. (((((llmt)))))

It is normal to be scared during the initial separation. There are so many unanswered questions.

In addition to dealing with the emotional fallout, you also have to deal with practical matters--where to live, custody issues, finances.

One thing to do is allow your attorney to carry some of that load. That's why you pay him/her. When I finally did that, it was amazing how much my stress and fears deminished.

You must also lean on family and friends right now. This will help too.

Remember, you're not alone. We will walk you through the journey.

Hugs!

I was scared at first too, beginnings of anything are often scary.

You will get used to it, and find way to make it work. In the end you will feel a lot more confident as you conquer you fears. The key is to keep facing them and moving through them.

I still get scared at times. And sometimes it knocks me down for a day or two. In the beginning it knocked me down for a month.

It's all ok. It's NOT a contest to see who can recover fastest.

I so completely understand what you're talking about. I struggled with that fear for years, through the separation, divorce, and post divorce. I'd been so lonely during my marriage, that I was scared to death that I would be alone after it.

I can tell you, from absolute experience, it won't be like this forever. You have your sons, people here...lean on the people here. Make friends and let them support you.

It may seem like it won't get better, but I promise, it does.

It is so unsettling and unsure isn't it I still feel apprehensive at times. I think this is perfectly normal but also just darn hard. You'll put one foot in front of the other every day toward that future that has great things in store for you and the boys. And there are folks here that will walk right with you.

The emotions early on are so raw -- for me abanonment, rejection, seeing beyond the rose colored glasses and waking up to a reality that I didn't want to see.

Scared came in for me in the uncertainty of the future. How to handle finances, my emotions, still be competent at work, how to I reshape and find friends in this new place - I don't have much time to do this, and of course parenting the kids through this and being there for them. Each week things get a little less overwhelming.

Hang in there - many good suggestions here. The attorney is helpful, good friends, and for me the knowledge of the process - what legally happens next. Take a deep breath - we're right here.

Hell ya.. it is scary. Most of us have been there... nothing wrong with saying it out loud.. you are at least acknowledging it...good for you.

I am still scared.... I use to sleep with the cell phone in my hand at night.....wake with it imprinted it on my palm.
I was with him over 26 years.... I didn't know how to be alone.

ya.. I have the kids...but it is still scary.

know that we are here with you.... talk to us...call a friend if you can and let them know that sometimes you might need to talk so you are not alone.

((((((((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))) be well.

I was kind of scared of it too, at first, but then I realized that (1) I have my girls and (2) it is better to be alone and not worrying or stressing about who she's with or where she's at than it is to have to live like that. I would rather spend a lifetime single and happy/healthy than live with a compulsive liar and serial cheater.

We would rather you do as well DWH. :oP

ooh ouch DWH...you had one of those too?
Well..he can have his diseased old whore...I don't care...I just don't want him to be able to walk away free and clear.

Orient1...uh huh...I soo know that SURPRISE SURPRISE thing...happened to me in April.....court date is Sept 10th.
As it gets closer I'm a little more nervous. My butt is fully covered, lawyer, therapist, witnesses to his abuse and neglect and adultery....and...police reports...