Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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Why?

MrsG81
MrsG81
I'm new to this group and to be honest I didn't think I would ever be here. I have been married for five years to someone that I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. I got out of the military and moved to the west coast just to be with him. I wanted to start a family and so we did but unfortunately I miscarried at 18 weeks. It was a boy and we named him after my husband. We have gone through a lot in the past five years but we stood together. We bought a house last year and I found out that I was pregnant. Right now I am 8 1/2 months and my husband told me that he doesn't love me anymore. He is in love with his ex. He first told me this while I was on bedrest in the hospital and it seemed like day after day he told me something new. He doesn't love me the way he loves his ex and if she felt the same way about him he would leave me for her. Of course all of this was heartbreaking to hear especially being pregnant. Yesterday he told me that he wants a divorce. I told him that I wanted to make things work but he yelled at me for not realizing that his mind was made up. I tried my best and I gave it my all. The life that I envisioned for us is no more and I'm stuck here. I'm going to be a single parent with no job and no kind of income. He has offered to support me until I can find a job and he will always be there for our kid. My heart is broken and I feel so alone. I feel like I was lied to for the past five years. I have no friends here and I'm scared. I don't want to be alone. I don't know what to do.
deleted_user
deleted_user
This post answered my previous questions to you and then some. I don't even know where to begin. I am so horrified at the cold heartedness of him not even having the decency to wait another couple of weeks, especially being out there with no one. I wish I could offer more help to you than simply a friend but I am all the way in Virginia. There has got to be some local support group or women that will midwife or dula for you under these circumstances. Maybe you can ask someone at your hospital. I'm just throwing ideas out there but it breaks my heart to think of you going through this alone.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am sooo sorry for what you are going through...uugghh I can't even imagine. he is surely not the person you thought he was or how he portrayed himself and I am soo sorry for that. However, you will soon be a mother and your life is going to change in the most amazing way. It is not an easy road but you will make it! I would suggest getting divorced as soon as you can and make sure you get a great attorney to help you will child support etc. I do think you are lucky in a way because your child will not be confused or hurt by this since he isn't going to be there anyway. To me watching my children (7 & 8) have to deal with the mess that has been made of our family is heartbreaking. Right now my husband and I are in a "holding pattern" since financially we can't support two homes. It isn't easy and I know eventually we will have to make the full separation but as awful as I feel it is not me I worry about it's my young kids. I will go on...but sadly since we have kids we can't be NO CONTACT like I wish we could :( Soon you will be sooo busy and so full of love and joy at your new baby..there truly is nothing like it. Focus your attention there now and take care of you and your baby. If he wants a divorce I would try moving back closer to family and friends who can be there to help support you. Good luck and I am soo sorry you are having to deal with this. Better to find this out now though than further down the road..trust me!
MrsG81
MrsG81
Thanks you guys for the encouragement. I'm trying not to think about it but it's hard especially since we still live together. I'm going to miss the intimacy and just being with him. It hurts alot and I'm afraid that I will never find someone that will love me for me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh, honey,you will, trust me.
You have your whole life ahead of you and although it may not seem like it now, this is probably the best thing for you and your baby. I totally agree with justgettingby, the sooner the better! The longer you're in your relationship the harder it is to sever...take it from me, 13 years running and 3 1/2 kids later, it's like pulling a hundred knives out of your body one by one and each one is a hurt that's there for a terrible reason. I wish I had had the sense to get out so much sooner than this. It will take time to heal your broken heart but you and your baby deserve so much more than this man is clearly able to give you.
lovingmyselfirst
lovingmyselfirst
hang in there girl, you are living something so unfair now....however, you are about to find out how WONDERFUL being a mom is. I have 3 sons, and, to me that is the BEST thing that ever happened to me....to see them grow, develop into happy human beings and they bring so much joy to your life is not like anything else you have ever experienced before. wait until you see his/her little face....you will fall in love with that baby.....and you know what, if you do a great job as a mom, he/she will always stand by your side in life...you will no longer be alone. trust me, i know what I'm talking about..:) hugs))))