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I posted in the addiction group, but no responses, please help:
I had a suspicion my sister was a drug addict, but because she was homeless, I let her come live with me. Her arms are covered in needle marks and her legs look like the alligator skin, she gave me some BS story. Because I pushed her to, she finally found a job at a motel, only now she has lied about a guy who was just a friend, but actually now her boyfriend for the last few weeks now that she's been living with me, and taken off with him for 3 days to stay at the motel where she works. I snooped in her suitcases and found a bloody towel. What is that? Please don't tell me she was shooting up in my home! I have kids! Is it better for me to call the sheriff dept and have them watched and eventually arrested if so, or confront her myself with a drug test if she comes back? I want it out in the open so she can at least tell me if she doesn't want to kick it, she will leave, or get her help if she wants it.
Any comments and suggestions will be appreciated, please help me get through this!
I had a suspicion my sister was a drug addict, but because she was homeless, I let her come live with me. Her arms are covered in needle marks and her legs look like the alligator skin, she gave me some BS story. Because I pushed her to, she finally found a job at a motel, only now she has lied about a guy who was just a friend, but actually now her boyfriend for the last few weeks now that she's been living with me, and taken off with him for 3 days to stay at the motel where she works. I snooped in her suitcases and found a bloody towel. What is that? Please don't tell me she was shooting up in my home! I have kids! Is it better for me to call the sheriff dept and have them watched and eventually arrested if so, or confront her myself with a drug test if she comes back? I want it out in the open so she can at least tell me if she doesn't want to kick it, she will leave, or get her help if she wants it.
Any comments and suggestions will be appreciated, please help me get through this!
As a recovering addict myself and given what you have stated about the shape of her body/skin, I would bet dollars to donuts that she is an active addict and in that you really only have 2 choices.
Confront her when (if) she gets back and ask her if she is using. If she says no? Drop the drug test on her and say prove it. If she balks and/or gets pissed and tries to make you feel like shit for not believing her? Then odds are she is definitely using and if its a definite no go on the drug test you should tell her she needs to leave. You have your home and your kids that must come first in reality, in spite of loving and wanting to help your sister.
People lie in general, but addicts are masters at it and we are experts at manipulating others and laying guilt on them and in that, getting them to enable us. Don't get sucked into that. If she is WILLING (key word) to admit to her using and getting treatment? That's a whole different story. But if she stonewalls, lies, etc.? Its only going to get worse and if you allow her to stay get ready for a bumpy, painful ride. It will not get better. It will get worse. That I can promise you.