Oh God, yes... so I decided to divide my crap into three categories:-
1. I miss her, can't stand her, and want to talk about her all the time.
2. I'm lonely because I miss being with someone.
3. I have various preexisting issues.

#1 talk to therapist about #1 issues
#2 hang out with friends as usual (but don't talk about #1)
#3 see #1 :-) but occasionally ask for friends' advice

You're only a burden if you sound like a broken record. Then again, so long as it's funny, it's OK to talk about the same things over and over albeit in new, interesting ways. Isn't that what old friends do?

Ok, I know what you are talking about bc I know someone who went through a divorce, and they always want to come over and hang out and not leave. Lol. Or get together all the time. It's a little annoying even though I understand that they just don't want to be alone. That's why having group activities like at meetups.com and at church or community library, anywhere you can hang with different people and not drain just one or two. It's healthier for both of you and will save your friendship

Oh ya, been there, done that. But in my case, it was my mother that I leaned on (way too much I know). While I'm sure there were times she wanted to kill me due to "broken record syndrome", she is my mother and would never leave me. That's probably how I managed not to alienate my friends, because my mother took brunt of it. Having gone through this myself, if I had a friend who was going through this, I'd be a lot more understanding than I otherwise would have been so I'd say get into therapy if you are not already so you can vent there...lean on friends who have been through this in moderation if you have some...when neither of these are an option vent on this site (that's why I joined) and follow blondies advice...find ways to distract yourself by trying to meet some new people and engaging in new activities. I know it's hard when some days you don't even want to get out of bed in the morning or talk to anyone, but force yourself. Hugs.

My problem is that I don't have a lot of friends of my own. Most of my friends are mutual with my wife. I am blessed to have very supportive co-workers (most of whom know something is going on with me, but don't know the details), but I don't want to be a burden on them. I'll probably end up being a burden to all of you too, so feel free to tell me to get on my life if you need to. :-)

I can definitely relate to this feeling. I feel like when I call my friend and cry about my breakup, I'm being a burden. Initially I felt strong after the breakup but lately I've been a puddle of emotions who loses it whenever I see a sappy commercial or a trailer for a new romance movie. I've found that going to a therapist is a very good idea and if it's something you're interested in, you should definitely give it a try if you haven't already. Blessings!

I try to avoid talking about it with the friend that has taken me in to be roommates with him. He has never been married and with what I am going through, he doesn't even want to get close to a woman again. So unless he asks me about it in some specific way, I stay away from it.

And the last thing I want to do is be a burden to my other friends. It is a tricky, fine line.....I go to support group on Thursdays, visit my counselor each week, and the same with my pastor.

Talking with others that have recently gone through it or are going through it seems to have worked best. We can share our sadness, regrets, fears, struggles.......and hope.

I am at the point where I can't even talk about it too much now, as I hate getting triggered when I.'m out and want to start thinking about other things when I'm out with a friend

Perhaps this is the start of the healing process?

Up
and
down

Absolutely. I only talk about it with 2 friends and my sponsor at this point. Anyone else, and I feel like a drain...a PIA...annoying, and so on.

I got past it by having those few reassure me....they are there if I need them, but I also know that sitting in that place of living in the past, and even with how I still feel now....it will only set me back.

I have worked on combating my loneliness by just living my life and doing things that I enjoy doing....when I isolate, it gets that much worse so I have to literally force myself to meet up with friends, reach out, etc.

I will say....it just ebbs and flows...some days I am great....other days? It feels like the end of the world. Still. Hang in there.

Hugs to twilight soul and Murphy. Xxxxxxxxxx. :)

Yes. At first everyone was great, very sympathetic and so supportive but it seems like after about three months no one wanted to hear it anymore. Now there's only a couple of friends that I rely on for support. And my therapist of course. She's been really great and very validating. It's nice to know that I'm not crazy.