Breakups & Divorce Support Group

Just broke up with someone or in the midst of a difficult divorce? Breaking up is difficult no matter what the circumstances are. They say that time heals all wounds, but sometimes a listening ear or a hug can work wonders for the heart. Whether you need a place to vent, someone to hold you to No Contact, or need advice about what to do, we're here to help.

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am I crazy?

sunsets1386
sunsets1386
I've been dating the same guy for three years now. I'm 26 & would like one day to get married and have a family. Three years doesn't sound like a long time but I feel like no one is going to want me now. My boyfriend family thinks i'm crazy bc I used to have a xanax addiction i'm so proud of my self for overcoming a year and a half ago and staying sober but his family had not seen me, and a few of his good friends since one of my outburst s... I guess bc I know i'm a deeply kind and loving and normally sane smart young adult with something, no a lot! , to offer I don't understand why they can't get over it and give me a second chance. his brother just graduated college and is moving to town tonight to work with my boyfriend and his Dad and I just feel like i'm being thrown away like garbage. its the dull aching of knowing no matter what I do nothing well ever be good enough. Ever. So why am I staying around? My heart loves him, I don't want to be with anyone else. I'm moving out on my own son again, been staying between his house and my moms... And I just want to get past this or i'm just going to validate their crazy beliefs.someone please tell me I'm not crazy for staying around someone who is embarrassed to tell hiss family we are together... Ugh that its crazy lol...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Wow. I can tell you that I'm just ending a 24-year marriage to a man whose family never liked me, and they were pretty obvious about it. It doesn't ever get any easier. They would fake it pretty good at times, but I never felt like "family" the way they made my sister-in-law's husband feel.

You can't control what they think of you. I know I couldn't. My concern would be with your boyfriend being embarrassed. I wouldn't want to be with anyone who was embarrassed to be with me. He need to grow up and grow a spine. My STBX never did. Three years is a long time, and you have nothing to prove to these people. Be you, and if they don't like it (including your boyfriend), then move on to someone else.

We all think we won't ever find anyone else, but by looking around at all the second, third, etc. marriages there are out there, obviously chances are good that there is someone else out there for you. Hopefully someone who treats you better.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Not to be blunt, but get out now before you spend any more time on someone who doesn't like you just the way you are. There will always be another love, you just have to give it time.
stillbitterjaded
stillbitterjaded
You were addicted to a prescription drug. That makes you pretty common actually.

Kudos for your sobriety. I'm very proud of you because that is a very difficult thing to do. Takes work, effort, determination and drive.

If his family cannot accept you, and get past this, you need to know if boyfriend will let them go to be with you. You cannot be with a person that doesn't appreciate you, or doesn't actively stand up for you. If he doesn't stand UP for you, he's AGAINST you.
sunsets1386
sunsets1386
He well stand up for me sometimes, but even then he's doing it almost to defend himself not so much me. Its just confusing and makes me almost feel like the crazy one for not seeing what everyone else sees. Thanks for the support y'all
deleted_user
deleted_user
Yes, if you can get out now, please try to do so before you have kids. I want to leave but it's very hard, I did marry this person and we have 2 kids. I live on the same property as his brother and his family as well as his parents. His sister and sister in law I always feel like they are ganging up on me. It's very hurtful and stressful, especially since I don't want to live so close to them all and my husband says how he doesn't ever want to move. My husband's family thinks I'm crazy because I use to do self-injury to 'relieve' my stress caused by them all, ya ya, I blame them....but I was so stressed out because at the time I was being told I could be a stay at home mom but I ended up being the one going to work all day when my son was 6 months old and his father would sleep all day! No body could really see why I was so upset but it was so very obvious to me.
fakeblonde
fakeblonde
When you marry someone, you marry their family. Unfortunately, they don't always have healthy and supportive families. My late mother-in-law and sister-in-law both hated me for telling my stepdaughters it was inappropriate to tell their dad to f*** off, and then screamed at me it was my fault when my mentally ill husband had a breakdown and I had to have him hospitalized. There are just some people who aren't kind, compassionate and forgiving. Unless your bf's family does a complete turnaround, the stress they will put on you guys will be unbearable. I don't wish this on anyone.