I flipped out and ended in the hospital. When I said I wanted to die, I couldn't even do that right. I went off my meds three months ago, and I guess this is what happens when you do this. I really hate these feelings. I WANT TO BE NORMAL!! The pain goes on and on...............................It helped some being in the hospital, but going home in the real world sucks. I have no one to talk to. Mom is ashamed of me and told me so. No support there. So I am trying to feel better as the pdoc gave me meds. I know it takes time for some of the drugs to take effect. So that is what I am doing. Waiting.....I guess I want to vent.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??