Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Hi Everyone,
It's been a while since I last posted and been part of this community.
A little bit of background: I was diagnosed with bipolar when I was in grade 10. I think I hadn't had my birthday yet so I was 16. Basically I saw one psychiatrist ,got her opinion after she talked to me for 10 minutes and then she prescribed me lithium. It really didn't work and I began to be really depressed and unable to function on the lithium. My parents thought that was enough so I went to see another doctor for another opinion. The second doctor talked to me for a good hour and thought nothing was wrong with me. She thought I was going through teenage angst and that counseling would benefit me but that I didn't need meds.
For the next 4 years of my life I struggled on and off with depression (sometimes severe at times). I saw many doctors, was prescribed many medications, was hospitalized once. The problem is that no two doctors seemed to agree and I remained an enigma to them. Some thought I didn't have clinical depression due to the fact that before a crash I would become very agitated and hyper so they labeled me as bipolar. Others thought that I was not bipolar because I didn't have the classic symptoms of a "high" and I was never high for more than a 24 hour period. But any time I got high first then I would crash.
However, when I was 20 after being hospitalized I started taking birth control along with limotregine. Eventually, the psychiatrist stopped limotregin and I stopped seeing him and only saw my family doctor.
Since taking birth control for one year I have never again experience a high nor have I experience a very severe low. I am under the impression that maybe I got over my depression or that it was hormonal because when I went to the hospital they discovered I had the same hormones as a woman who was 4 months pregnant even though I was not pregnant!!
So now it's been over 3 years without a major depression or major high. I sometimes think that I might experience it again, but I am just really loving life. I have a steady job, am thinking of starting a family, and am thinking of marriage. I can function very well. I very recently was sexually assaulted and became depressed but I believe that is situational rather than chemical. After 3 months on antidepressants, the doctor told me I didn't need to go back on and now I've been off the antidepressants almost 6 months. There are still days that I struggle, but even when I was depressed after the assault it wasn't as serious as before. I went to work every day, had 3 meals a day, had the energy to work out, etc. Before when I was depressed I couldn't even get out of bed.
So now it is really bothering me because I feel that I really want to know whether I am still bipolar or not. There is a part of me that says if I haven't had symptoms in 3 years and am enjoying life I shouldn't worry about it unless something happens again. But I still really want to know what I have or don't have especially since doctors haven't agreed in the past. I am terrified to see another psychiatrist because the man who assaulted me was a psychiatrist. I also don't want to see a pdoc and have them label me as something just because someone in the past has labeled me with something and I feel that's what pdocs do oftentimes. I feel a lot of pdocs are just into prescribing medications... so I don't want to go to find out if I am or not and take meds even though life has been great for over 3 years.
I'm wondering if someone can help me out with this one. Thanks!
It's been a while since I last posted and been part of this community.
A little bit of background: I was diagnosed with bipolar when I was in grade 10. I think I hadn't had my birthday yet so I was 16. Basically I saw one psychiatrist ,got her opinion after she talked to me for 10 minutes and then she prescribed me lithium. It really didn't work and I began to be really depressed and unable to function on the lithium. My parents thought that was enough so I went to see another doctor for another opinion. The second doctor talked to me for a good hour and thought nothing was wrong with me. She thought I was going through teenage angst and that counseling would benefit me but that I didn't need meds.
For the next 4 years of my life I struggled on and off with depression (sometimes severe at times). I saw many doctors, was prescribed many medications, was hospitalized once. The problem is that no two doctors seemed to agree and I remained an enigma to them. Some thought I didn't have clinical depression due to the fact that before a crash I would become very agitated and hyper so they labeled me as bipolar. Others thought that I was not bipolar because I didn't have the classic symptoms of a "high" and I was never high for more than a 24 hour period. But any time I got high first then I would crash.
However, when I was 20 after being hospitalized I started taking birth control along with limotregine. Eventually, the psychiatrist stopped limotregin and I stopped seeing him and only saw my family doctor.
Since taking birth control for one year I have never again experience a high nor have I experience a very severe low. I am under the impression that maybe I got over my depression or that it was hormonal because when I went to the hospital they discovered I had the same hormones as a woman who was 4 months pregnant even though I was not pregnant!!
So now it's been over 3 years without a major depression or major high. I sometimes think that I might experience it again, but I am just really loving life. I have a steady job, am thinking of starting a family, and am thinking of marriage. I can function very well. I very recently was sexually assaulted and became depressed but I believe that is situational rather than chemical. After 3 months on antidepressants, the doctor told me I didn't need to go back on and now I've been off the antidepressants almost 6 months. There are still days that I struggle, but even when I was depressed after the assault it wasn't as serious as before. I went to work every day, had 3 meals a day, had the energy to work out, etc. Before when I was depressed I couldn't even get out of bed.
So now it is really bothering me because I feel that I really want to know whether I am still bipolar or not. There is a part of me that says if I haven't had symptoms in 3 years and am enjoying life I shouldn't worry about it unless something happens again. But I still really want to know what I have or don't have especially since doctors haven't agreed in the past. I am terrified to see another psychiatrist because the man who assaulted me was a psychiatrist. I also don't want to see a pdoc and have them label me as something just because someone in the past has labeled me with something and I feel that's what pdocs do oftentimes. I feel a lot of pdocs are just into prescribing medications... so I don't want to go to find out if I am or not and take meds even though life has been great for over 3 years.
I'm wondering if someone can help me out with this one. Thanks!
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Mom and I have errands to run this morning. She said we can get sushi for lunch though. I go back to work today. What are you looking forward to this weekend?
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Quick, before the evil MONday gets here! Let's climb those mountains, dance in the meadows, dip our feet in the ocean....Okay, so most of us won't be doing any of That. Sadly. But today can still be a great day!The area behind our back fence is on an incline, with less than two feet on even ground at the top. I don't balance well enough for the incline, but our mower guy mows that...
I'm really sorry that happened to you. You sound very brave and optimistic.
I'm not sure a nurse could do a diagnosis so I think it's a psychiatrist or nothing.
I do have BP and there is no doubt in my mind of it. However, when I was in my younger years and still menstruating, it was also so much more difficult with my depression and agitation/anger. Hormones played a huge part in my moods back then. I would recommend seeing an OB/GYN doc and going over all your history with him/her. It may be more of a hormonal trigger that causes your anger and depression.
I would start keeping a chart of how you feel daily...........just something simple indicating your moods and any physical pain or physical changes. Even on the pill you will have them. You could also ask for a break taking the bcp so you can compare your changes. I was pregnant 4 times and the odd thing was that my BP was NOT triggered during my pregnancies. My pdoc said my hormones could play a huge part in triggering or not with pregnancy or my periods.
This will be a confusing time for you but I would try not to let it stress you. Sometimes in life there are no answers and as Linda said "live in the moment". However, it may be important to answering any questions about getting pregnant. There are many people afraid to have children because of this disorder but selfishly, I wanted them. I have no regrets just questions, which I think is normal when raising four children while having BP. But, that is a whole other thread.
Best of luck and I hope you find your answers but I believe only time will tell you what you want to know. xo
I've been told not to focus on the labels too much (I have many by many different docs as well...) and just look at my symptoms and how to treat them individually with meds and therapy.
Only you can decide what is best for you. If you worry about something coming up again in the future, you could always locate a therapist whom you connect with just to have a professional to check in with occasionally. If that would give you peace of mind.