Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
Hey yall. My dad just left. He has been here twice today. He says he just comes by to check on granny and us, but I wonder.......See, and I know some of you know this already, but my dad had something to do with me sexually when i was a teenager. He manipulated me into having sex with him. Well.........he just moved back to Georgia from Michigan. Since he first announced that he was moving back about a year and a half ago, I have been having PTSD symptoms. I am okay now for the most part unless he touches me. But........the fucker keeps touching me. He will put his hands on my shoulders while he is talking at or to me calling me baby and being all sweet. I just cringe and wither up on the inside but feel powerless to stop it on the outside. He still for some reason unknown to me has power over me. I have fear of confrontation or of setting boundaries with him. Why am I like that? Why can't I just tell him not to touch me? I think it is because of my granny that lives with me. That's his mom. But, somehow I think even if she weren't here that I would still feel powerless. Help me understand please.
Maybe you can start by practicing saying NO to him. Stand in front of the mirror and try ten different ways to say no. Write him a letter telling him to fuck off. Get someone you trust to pretend to be him and work on saying NO to someone's face.
Also take a self- defense course. They really helped me not feel so weak and afraid. Plus, then you might not be triggered as much when he touches you because you know you could kick his fucking ass.
((((((BIG HUGS))))))))
Think that twosidesof me is on the right track try and have someone there that you trust and feel safe with when ever he is around if you can
How about you and your daughter taking a self-defense class together. It would be good for her to have, she's old enough now plus she'll be on her own soon and this could help aleviate some of the worry.
Plus it woud be a good way to instill some self-love for her, and you.
They have a lot for free at government centers and some libraries etc. Just call United Way or google it. It'd be good for both of you.
NONE of this is YOUR fault.
I hope you will consider talking to someone about this on a professional level. They can help you through this very painful time.
The child within is still very afraid and I dont blame her. You should have been able to trust this man.
There are crisis centres, or perhaps a minister you could talk to if you cant get to a counciler
I hope in time you will be able to tell him to leave and not come back. But until you can know you are not at fault at all.
Bless you special lady and a big hug of comfort
My uncle molested me from 2nd to 8th grade in my grandmothers home. I loved that woman and would die before I would have divulged that info to her and he knew it. It gave him "huge" power over me because I would not hurt her for the world and I knew she would not believe me. He was her little angel. Gatherings were very uncomfortable and I kept my distance. I DID NOT allow us to get close enough to be touched nor did I stay in the same room with him.
You might want to write your father a letter and tell him that when he does come to visit his mom, he needs to keep his distance from you, no touching and at least three feet space between you...........no reason, he will understand.
I was finally able to forgive my uncle and told him so on his death bed, (he died from liver scerosis) and my grandmother NEVER knew, thank God.
This is a very difficult thing to live with but you HAVE to draw boundaries even if just a few. I didnt allow my uncle to touch my children or be alone with them in the same room and he fully understood why and never said a word. I think your father will understand also.
I can see why he has to be in your house but a few questions still exist. Why not limits to his closeness, why is his mother not living with him? Personally, I think he is in a win win situation and he knows it. He knows he has this power over you which is what most abuse is about, POWER............take it away Zany....the power belongs to you, NOT him...........xo