I am having a really hard time I have been diagnosed with bipolar a few years ago but honestly I never really believed I was bipolar until this past year it has been very very hard I can't control my emotions and I'm tired of being sad and down although those words don't come close to how I actually feel. I feel like I am losing it, why do I have to be this way? I am not in a good head space I'm so down I have a headache and body aches from holding the tears and pain in the only thing on my mind is buying stuff and sex, well I spent all my money and this feeling won't go away either I have to buy something ( which I can't) or I HAVE to have sex which I don't want to because I've been trying so hard not to have sec because I never feel pleasure but I also can't get enough of it, it's been 4 months and I can't think straight because I'm so down and all I wanna do is have sex, to keep that urge at bay I brought things but now that I can't I'm having a really hard time it's so much I feel and want to say I'm just lost and I don't know what to do and I feel like I'm going to make a bad decision and I really don't want to