Bipolar Disorder Support Group
Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.
this is the only place where i have access to support.
my family have left me i have been alone for a long time.
i have shit friends. i have shit friends who take advantage of me, and who make me feel like shit. they are not friends and i need to get away from them.
i am truly never to trust anybody not even myself.
i took a blade to my skin and i sliced like a maniac. and now i feel better.
only i dont. only i feel like a disaster and a wreck. and i feel so
god damned borderline.
i feel so stupid and i wish i could get myself back. i dont recognise this person that i have become.
i take drugs so i dont have to be me transiently. only i am me when the drug finishes and i realise i have been wreckless and i am ashamed for being so destructive when i should be helping myself.
there is nowhere for me to turn.
im wishing on a miracle everyday that i wake up a different person, or that i dont wake up at all. i hoping that i will be able to gather the strength to finish my Alevels and get into University.
university is all i can think about. it is my ticket out of hell and im holding onto that thought hard because if i dont leave this town, and if i dont get a degree and focus this energy onto something positive for MYSELF i am going to end up dead. and thats a fact.
but it isnt fact enough to get help apparently. i am not mentally ill. i have a weak personality and i do not try hard enough. i do not need help because i am a failure and because i am a bad person.
this is all because of him. i would kill him if it wasnt so illegal.
my family have left me i have been alone for a long time.
i have shit friends. i have shit friends who take advantage of me, and who make me feel like shit. they are not friends and i need to get away from them.
i am truly never to trust anybody not even myself.
i took a blade to my skin and i sliced like a maniac. and now i feel better.
only i dont. only i feel like a disaster and a wreck. and i feel so
god damned borderline.
i feel so stupid and i wish i could get myself back. i dont recognise this person that i have become.
i take drugs so i dont have to be me transiently. only i am me when the drug finishes and i realise i have been wreckless and i am ashamed for being so destructive when i should be helping myself.
there is nowhere for me to turn.
im wishing on a miracle everyday that i wake up a different person, or that i dont wake up at all. i hoping that i will be able to gather the strength to finish my Alevels and get into University.
university is all i can think about. it is my ticket out of hell and im holding onto that thought hard because if i dont leave this town, and if i dont get a degree and focus this energy onto something positive for MYSELF i am going to end up dead. and thats a fact.
but it isnt fact enough to get help apparently. i am not mentally ill. i have a weak personality and i do not try hard enough. i do not need help because i am a failure and because i am a bad person.
this is all because of him. i would kill him if it wasnt so illegal.
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Some things we don't talk about, we breathe them... Some things cannot be explained, but rather experienced. Some of the most healing moments arise when given the memory, acknowledging the love.One cannot go back in time; we move forward, and we carry the love we shared. No one but ourselves has the power to do so, or the permission to do so, but ourselves.So live life with your faith and...
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I've been feeling like I don't matter my wife the other day instead of telling me she was having a pain day when I went to have sex with her she tell me afterwards that she having pain day due to her fribromyalgia and making feel like shit afterward saying she has a list of things from past 9 years of thing for me to do and is always adding more and more to this list and talk...
I don't know if you've started therapy yet sweetie.. but if and when you do it will take some time to find stability .. But you WILL!!!..
Be kind to you.. You deserve it
Great big hug of comfort for you sweetie..xo
theres a 2 year waiting list and i havent even been given an actual nurse and its taken 18 months to get a follow up appointment.
i feel hopless and thats okay. because there seems to be valuable evidence for the fact that i should be hopeless.