Bipolar Disorder Support Group

Bipolar disorder is not just a single disorder, but a category of mood disorders marked by periods of abnormally high energy and euphoria, often accompanied by bouts of clinical depression. This is the place to talk about your experience with bipolar disorder, learn from others' experiences, and find support.

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not working

theloveisgone
theloveisgone
My meds are not working. I'm taking tegretol and klonopin and its just not enough. I've been so depressed, quit my job, stopped going to therapy, nightmares, bad sleep, suicidal thoughts... just thoughts, I sit around in my pajamas and cry all day. I did apply to three jobs today and I have been going to the gym at least three times a week. This is just maddening. I gotta go to the doctors next week to find out if I have HIV cause my boyfriend has it. We just found out three months ago so this is my second test. I feel exceedingly more depressed as I write this as this is just the very beginning of my mass of worries. No wonder I'm depressed right? Shit is bad. Shit is really bad. I wake up every morning with homicidal thoughts about my neighbor who beat up me and my boyfriend onin January and I have to hear him walking up and down the stairs. I just wish one thing would go right and give me some freaking hope! I don't know how much longer till I snap... and then what?
tommymott
tommymott
Oh boy, you've got lots of stress going on. If you're going to the gym and out looking for a job 3 times a week I don't think you have a pure depression but that your depressive symptoms are an attempt to cope with everything that's going on. You can check out adding meds but I think you'll get the best help out of reducing your stress.
theloveisgone
theloveisgone
How exactly am I supposed to do that! Forget that my life exists? Don't get me wrong I appreciate your feed back but the whole point is there is no end to my stress. Its all overlapping
starfish
starfish
I understand, tommy is right in principle, but it's a lot easier said than done...and sometimes, things do just hit you sideways and you can't do a whole lot about it. Are you able to consult your dr. sooner than next week, and see if you can change your meds? I know how maddening it is, waiting to see if you're getting horrible news or not. Breathe, deep and slowly, as much as you can to calm yourself. It really does help disrupt the anxiety cycle. Is there any chance you can move? I would not cope well with that right next door, either.

What you need, is some way to interrupt this downward spiral you're in....if you're getting in really bad shape, that may mean a trip to the hospital.
theloveisgone
theloveisgone
Im breathing... no chance of a sooner appointment.. already called three times. I'm trying to move but I need money to do that which is why I am looking for a job in the first place. I need to get out of here soon or yes I most certainly will end up on the hospital