Hello all, I'm new. Just would love to get some feedback on my situation.
my mother is a recovering alcoholic with borderline personality disorder and my father died of terminal illness four years ago.
three and a half years ago she got sober and while I was away at school she moved a man who is a recovering heroin addict and his two young chidren into our house, I never new these people prior to that.
i am home for the holidays on a three month break in my studies and I am living in my old house again.
I am so devastated seeing how she treats this man and his children so much better than she treated my brother and I growing up. Her and this man never married so the situation is really ambiguous but his daughter considers me and my mom her family which only adds confusion to the situation because I don't reciprocate. Her 'partner' has a very bitter ex wife that hasn't gotten over the divorce and tries to get the kids in the middle of it, my mom is the last priority. Even though she treated me bad it upsets me to see this guy treat her with complete apathy when my father was so good to her. I didn't come home for almost three years and then when I got back on track with school i started leaning more on my family and couldn't afford to stay anywhere else. I want to remain focused on my end goal and graduate in 2021 but I don't think I can take any more of this and want to just leave the house today and never see these people again. She is paying for my school and I've already asked her it I can stay with a friend for the rest of the break but because of my bipolar she "doesn't trust that" and said she will cut off my studies if I leave.
in the time I was away from home ironically all of my mood symptoms went away and in the past few weeks since being back, they are back again.
i am going through an online course from home and haven't been able to focus on my studies since I've been here. So I know a new environment would help me to study for the final exam. Am I trying to run away or is this emotionally abusive past triggering me?
how is it that I am being asked to share something with this other mans children that I never had growing up?
My friend died early this morning. I have been visiting her on a different floors at the same hospital I was in than when I was discharged I would visit daily. Last night I knew it wouldn't be long until she was gone. The good part was lots and lots of people were coming in and out it was like grand central station, the best part was it was nothing but laughter and love. The reason why I'm...